Season 2: Episode 6: Love and Sex in SATC

Speaker 1 00:00:06 Hi, and welcome to season two of does this make me look old, a podcast about aging as gracefully as possible when you're just not ready or too Speaker 2 00:00:14 Middle aged friends, one middle-aged friend and one friend who seems to be diluted about her age, who wants to discuss topics around aging as they're starting to become more relevant to us, whether one wants to admit that to themselves or not. Speaker 1 00:00:29 Yes, well I'm SIM and anthropologist at heart Dory from finding Nemo and spirit, and basically never going to be the type to Everett, Speaker 2 00:00:38 Maybe to be moved. And I'm sure a physician interested in the science and medicine around aging, but also interested in how society and the media look at aging. And if that means that I have to take the hit by reading gossip, blogs to find out I will do so Speaker 1 00:00:51 This season, we channel our love for pop culture and learning and talk about shows, books, people, everything, all through the lens of getting Speaker 2 00:01:00 We'll be covering topics such as how sexuality changes as you age aging as a disease, and even how sex and the city approaches aging. Now that Carrie is in her fifties Speaker 1 00:01:09 Throughout it all. We chat Lance and laugh, but our own adult illness. Speaker 2 00:01:14 So join us as we navigate our second quarter-life crisis. Speaker 3 00:01:20 Hi, welcome to this week's episode of does this make me look old times I was called myself, so Speaker 1 00:01:27 That's okay. Not true at all. I'm going to pretend like it is, cause that just made my day when shit even exactly. Speaker 3 00:01:44 Anyway, it'll be one of those episodes this week. Speaker 1 00:01:50 Very much like every other week. Speaker 3 00:01:53 Pretty much, pretty much. It's not like we're changing anything really. Oh my goodness. That's just part of the joy of listening to one of our podcasts. Speaker 1 00:02:02 That's right. It's um, unrehearsed. Yep. Speaker 3 00:02:09 Total mayhem. Total Speaker 1 00:02:13 Eloquence comes from it's what makes us sincere. Speaker 3 00:02:17 Okay. Yeah, let's go with that. Yeah. All my, all my arms and AHS are just, uh, yeah. They're like, uh, they're indicative of a higher level of functioning, Speaker 1 00:02:27 Correct? Speaker 3 00:02:29 Sure. Speaker 1 00:02:32 Happy Valentine's state guys. I mean, it's a couple of days after Valentine's for you, but Speaker 3 00:02:39 Yes, exactly. But this week is Valentine's day, week, I guess. And uh, yeah, we've got a special episode for you in the sense that, uh, we are, well, we're going to be talking about as promised from last week, we're going to be talking about sex and love on the sex and the city reboot and just like that Speaker 1 00:03:01 Sex and love. And one of them two is probably my favorite topics one Speaker 3 00:03:08 And then, and listeners, you have to guess which one it is. Yeah. So, so it's so funny. Cause like we were talking about this offline and I was telling, I was telling SIM let's talk about it from episode to episode, with regard to like the sex and then SIM reamed me out Speaker 1 00:03:33 Because that was the most privileged statement yet. It's not like it's the smart girl privilege. So for figured it out shit is like one of those people where she's just the most incredibly smart and articulate people out there that let these, that in my world. And you know, that's Speaker 3 00:04:04 Sweet. I don't, I don't think it shows off in this podcast Speaker 1 00:04:08 They chose because she I'm convinced she has a photographic memory and can retain information from, I don't know, like she just knows, first of all, she knows shit all the time. Like there's not any topic that you can bring up and that she's not aware of. Like even on a very, even if it's on a superficial level, which it never is. Cause it's usually in depth. Um, but he, she will know and it could be on any random topic. Right. It could be about a car, um, about like supply issues with, uh, like something with like a, you know, a car over there, like where I don't even know what the types of cars are out there. It could about, um, anything science-related for sure. Um, but pop culture, um, money like investments, uh, I'm trying to think of random, stupid topics that, you know, I don't even know the words of like, and that's why I'm wondering because I'm like, what else is there in life? You know? Um, and, and the thing is, so she'll always take this approach where it's like, what? You don't know this, but everybody knows this. And it's like, who the fuck is everybody? Everybody? No, I do not know this. I did not retain information. Oh, but you read this. No, no, I may have read it, but I didn't understand it. You know, like Speaker 3 00:05:36 You're too funny now you've hyped me up. Everyone's going to expect that I know shit. I don't know. Speaker 1 00:05:43 Well, you know, more shit than I do and that's all. So anyway, so my point being though, was that the reason I reamed her out and you know, she was upset about it for two seconds. But the reason for that is because, I mean, seriously episode by episode, first of all, I don't even remember how many episodes I watched Episode by episode. It has to be random. It has to be haphazard and it kind of has to go off in tangents to other shows and other things. And Speaker 3 00:06:16 That's just how we are. Speaker 1 00:06:18 We are correct. So privileged smartphone privileged. Speaker 3 00:06:25 I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I, I'm sorry that I didn't think of that, that privilege, which honestly didn't really know that I have, but I've been put in my place. We won't go episode by episode, but I will start off. I will start off with episode one because the one thing I did remember about like starting the episode off was the fact that the only sex that was being had in the episode was, and this really pained me deeply was by Miranda son, Brady the girlfriend. Yes. And honestly I was repulsed, Speaker 1 00:07:06 Like, why are you only showing the teens having sex? Speaker 3 00:07:10 Exactly. And I'm like, I am by no means approved, Speaker 1 00:07:14 But that the helmet, Speaker 3 00:07:17 Oh my goodness. Oh. And, and big masturbating. And that was like one of them, but it was just like, so not sexy, like nothing, nothing, nothing about the sex in that first episode of AngelList, just like that was sexy. It was all very, very, very painful, very painful to watch. And just, Speaker 1 00:07:36 We did talk about how the first few episodes of those show and we're just full of cringe anyway. Speaker 3 00:07:44 So Speaker 1 00:07:45 It was just yet another aspect of it, where it was crunch, but you were right. Like the only focus was, oh, look, it's the horny teenagers stereotype, right? Yeah, Speaker 3 00:07:57 Yeah, yeah, exactly. Second, we'll get into this as the podcast goes on, but like I get it, like, I think what they were trying to show very badly was the fact that like in the Hobbs Brady, um, oh no, it was in the hubs. What is Steve's last name anyway, whatever. So in basically in Miranda's household, the only sex that was being had was by the son make basically stealing Miranda sex life was dead. Yeah. I think that's basically what they were trying to set up, but it was just like what Speaker 1 00:08:31 She wasn't attracted to him anymore. Right. Yeah. But they didn't actually go there I guess, but, but sex in the city and just like that, um, you know, it took them a while to sort of start coming around to the sex and the love part of it. But I mean, I'm mind you, they, weren't dealing with a, quite a lot of stuff in the first couple of episodes, including death and, and, and, you know, getting your hair. That's true. That's true. But, um, tell me, what's the biggest standout for you so far in terms of love or sex in the show? Speaker 3 00:09:14 Yeah, let me think. Okay. So the one thing I will say was that what I was hoping would happen was what was in the last scene of like, not the last scene. It was like in the last episode where SEMA got together with that guy, I'm like, why not? Why is the sex not like, this was just so glamorous and just so fun. And I was just like, how come no one else is having sex? Like she, Speaker 1 00:09:42 Because it took them 10 episodes to show that a 50 year old woman is sexy and can have good sex, man. Like that was awesome. Speaker 3 00:09:52 Oh, I know. Yeah, exactly. I'm just like, I have to wait until episode 10 for this. Like, this is what I've been waiting for the entire time. Oh my. Speaker 1 00:10:01 I was like, wow. It took me, did take them 10 episodes to get there. But, um, so, so yes, that was definitely my, the one that I would sort of say was the height. Like that was the Speaker 3 00:10:14 Best. Yes, that was the best. Speaker 1 00:10:16 But, um, the one that I couldn't get over was why was it such a big deal? And, um, I can't remember which episode it was so sorry guys again, but I'm pretty sure it happened. And Chevrolet correct me if I'm wrong. I, when they're all shocked that, uh, Charlotte still gives blow jobs. Speaker 3 00:10:37 Oh my God. Speaker 1 00:10:39 Why was this a big deal? Like, it was funny for an initial, like initially it was like what you said. And I actually do have to admit, I kind of laughed. But then I was like, then I started to think like a rational person. And I'm like, why is that weird? If exactly Speaker 3 00:10:55 I Speaker 1 00:10:55 Know it was the still, you still do it. I'm like still Speaker 3 00:10:58 Doing Speaker 1 00:10:59 Exactly what, what do you mean if you still do it? Like her marriage is supposed to be boring. Her sex life was supposed to be boring or she's supposed to be boring. Like Speaker 3 00:11:09 I know like she enjoys doing that for her husband. Like, I don't understand that basically they were sex shaming, her and I was really upset by it. I was just like, why are you doing this? Like what? She can't like, what? Like, you've been married for 20 years and suddenly like that part of your sex life just dies. Like, I mean, I'm not saying that it, like, I'm not saying that people don't do it. Like I have problems. What I'm saying is if this couple enjoys doing it, I don't think you should be shaming them for it. Like Charlotte still likes doing it. It's a part of her like sexual repertoire. It's fine. Like, meanwhile, Miranda's like freaking out that she still does it. And like even Carrie too, Speaker 1 00:11:52 I just surprised me, like fine. You know, you and Steve were so not attracted to each other mind you, they really never were attracted to each other. I feel like now that I'm thinking back on, um, like, you know, it almost did feel like she settled for him in a way, right? Speaker 3 00:12:10 Yeah. Yeah. I think that, like, I think we do kind of forget the journey that Steve and Miranda had it. It was like, and Steve calls like, so, okay. Spoiler alert. So like as always, yeah. Like, I mean, and like good for Steve because he does call her out on it. Like, I think when they're having that discussion about what, like where their marriage should be going, like, I think he calls her out on it. Like he's never been good enough for her. And it's true. Like throughout, like throughout the show, like Speaker 1 00:12:43 I've never been good at that. And I think that that's what was at the crux of the breakup there. Yeah. Um, but yeah, that's whole sex shaming thing, but Carrie sex shaming, her Speaker 3 00:12:54 Exactly. I expected Moran to be sex shaming her, not to that extent. I mean, she was honestly going on for like a full minute. I'm like calm down Miranda. Like, like even Carrie I'm like what? Like, you never did it for big and okay, fine. If you didn't do it. But like, I don't understand why you're bugging Charlotte about it. It's just bizarre. Speaker 1 00:13:11 Yeah. I was, I was, that was the one that bothered me a little bit and not a little bit, but it bothered me a lot, but the other one was Carrie. Um, I w it was probably in one of the earlier episodes, but, um, so, uh, you know, item number three on the list, I guess, um, the scene where Carrie discusses masturbation on air and Che and Jimmy, like, they're all talking about masturbating stories on the episode that they're recording and Carrie just gets all prudish. And I was like, Carrie, really? Like, and, and, and Chad actually calls her out on. It says, you're the original, like you did this back in the nineties and early two thousands. Speaker 3 00:14:05 I know you were a sex columnist. Speaker 1 00:14:09 Even if you don't speak it out loud and you've wrote about it, are you able to speak about it? Like, why do you suck like such a prude? I know. And then the way she goes home and she asks big, if he still masturbates and I'm like, what's the love of your life? Like, if he's still does, what, what, like, how would you not that a little bit. Speaker 3 00:14:38 I mean, would you know, like, we'll try to know. I would think, like, I don't know, like, I mean, I w I would think that you wouldn't be like, Speaker 1 00:14:47 Like, it wouldn't be like that she brought it up was like, do you still, Speaker 3 00:14:54 Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Kind of like, it's impossible. It's impossible to believe that you would type them. Yeah, exactly. I see what you're saying. Cause I was just like, how would she know if he was doing it while she was out of the, Speaker 1 00:15:08 And then when he's like, we'll do you, and then she goes, yes. So then like, what the hell? Yeah. Like, you know, Speaker 3 00:15:16 Well, and the way that they, I think that scene bothered me too. Cause it was just done in like such a ham-fisted way. I was just like, this is not how people talk about it. No, I know. Like, it just seemed so it doesn't, it didn't okay. It didn't seem realistic and it wasn't sexy. Like, like, so if, if it's not going to be sexy, at least make it realistic, but you failed on both accounts of this scene should be cut. Like it was just stupid. Speaker 1 00:15:46 Yeah. Please cut that scene. Uh, like, uh, do they still make DVD sets? I don't even know this anymore. Speaker 3 00:15:56 Yeah, they do. They Speaker 1 00:15:56 Do in the whatever extended cut or like, you know, like a remixed cut that. Can they actually just do something about those scenes? Speaker 3 00:16:05 Oh, I know it was. Yeah. Like that was super. That was super hard to watch. I was just like this. Speaker 1 00:16:11 Oh, this is, this is painful. Okay. Yeah. So, okay. So we, we have three of the, the, the ones, but yes. So, so far SEMA Patel's scene with Zed. That was his name, right? Zed. Zed. Yeah. Yeah. Um, who is super hot by the way. Yeah, Speaker 3 00:16:30 Yeah, yeah. No like that. Yeah. No, I was just like, they're finally coming into Speaker 1 00:16:35 Ooh girl, like what exactly. That is hot sex with a hot guy. So I love her confidence. Like she, you know, um, I'm glad that they have her butt on the show, but, um, but yeah, I'm trying to think like for a show that's about sex in the city. Speaker 3 00:16:56 Yeah. It was very light, Speaker 1 00:16:59 Very light Miranda sex scene with chain. Speaker 3 00:17:03 Oh yeah. I was going to bring that up, but yeah, but overall they've been very, very light on this acts. Like it was just like, what are you trying to say? The people in their fifties don't have it anymore. I'm like, it's just, I don't know. I find that the commentary is a bit upsetting, like, oh, and then the one thing I did want to say though, um, is that like at least the one thing that I did like about the show is that they did bring about the fact that like, like through Miranda's story was that people do kind of, you know, they can kind of have changed their outlook on like what they expect out of their sex lives. Right. So, um, yeah. And that, and obviously there's that, yeah. There's that big, sexy, like, that's the major, major one, like other than CMOs, which is just like pure joy like that. The other one is just like, yeah. Is, um, is Miranda and Che and when they get together, Speaker 1 00:18:00 I don't know if I'm going to, like, I don't know where you stand on this one, but I can see why Miranda would be attracted to chain. Like the freedom she represents the attractiveness, like, you know, her joy for life, like whatever, right? Like the, her view, outlook, whatever you want to call Speaker 3 00:18:18 It. Like they, they have outlook. Speaker 1 00:18:21 Yes. Sorry. I need to learn how I need to watch. I apologize. But the part that I don't understand is why would they be so attracted to Miranda? Speaker 3 00:18:37 Oh, you think Miranda's kind of, I don't know, more sexy and fun. Like I, and different. Like, I would think that chain probably like, if you think about it, she's a standup comedian and like, you kind of get a little bit of a glimpse into their life because there's that scene that Moran like, um, there's that scene with her? There's that scene where Miranda is with Che and like they're in a diner, I think. And was it a diner? I can't remember. It had a diner vibe to it, but they're having like drinks and then those, um, those two fans come and like talk to Che about like getting their autograph. And then also talk about the fact that Jay hooked up with their friends. Do you remember that scene? No, Speaker 1 00:19:29 I'm sorry. This is also that happens frequently. Speaker 3 00:19:35 Well, anyway, but the thing is, is that like, I think that gives you kind of a slice of life or like a S like an idea of who Che's meeting when they're on their comedy tours. Right. Because it's, it's usually younger, it's usually younger people, um, who are at least those two that at least those two people that met up with chasing queer. So like, so it's like a totally different demographic. Right. So I can see that I can see that Miranda is kind of, is like in a weird way, a little bit exotic for Che. Right. It's like this kind of upper crust kind of like women woman in her fifties who was like previously straight and like, you know, like there's also that aspect. Speaker 1 00:20:24 I think of it that way for me, I think I'm just, I was like, oh my gosh, like you're exhausting me Miranda right now. You know? Um, and I think part of it is because I'm not quite understanding, like the way she's jumping from, you know, wanting to be an ally to being in LA. Like I get that she's going through a lot. And like, there's sort of showcasing how you might want to re you know, when you sort of have this evaluation of your life and you realize, oh my gosh, like I want to do something different and crazy. Right. Um, maybe I'm just a little bit too burnt out right now to actually appreciate that from, um, you know, from that perspective. So I think for me, I was like, okay, I can see what she sees in them. I don't see what they see in her. Speaker 3 00:21:15 No, I could S I could see it. I mean, Miranda's a little bit neurotic, but like still, like, she's, she's attractive, Speaker 1 00:21:22 Smart. You've actually dressing quite well in the reboot for sure. Speaker 3 00:21:27 Very nicely actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh my God. Yeah. The costumers have done her like that. They haven't done her a disservice like they did with her the past. Oh my God. Some of the outfits, the Miranda war in the past were just so bad, like Ani sores, Speaker 1 00:21:45 But no, here she's like really wearing some really nice outfits overall, Speaker 3 00:21:50 You know? Exactly, Speaker 1 00:21:51 Exactly. So, so props to, to her stylists. Speaker 3 00:21:55 Oh, for sure. Yeah, exactly. No, I can totally see it. Like it's a different, it would be a different vibe for Che. It would be a different kind of person that they would, that they may not come into contact with that often, to be honest, you know, like I could, I could see the appeal. Speaker 1 00:22:13 Yeah. I guess, I guess you're right. I should, I should keep an open mind there, but speaking of love or love and sex, I mean, we've moved touch on the sex scenes a little bit, but overall love, um, you know, w so Carrie's quest, like, you know, she's finally starting to put herself out there and she goes on this date. And again, I think that they're really doing a good job with Carrie's overall lines. So she has, she goes on this date with this teacher, right. Like this New York a couple of times, and then they go out for the third date when he asks for permission to kiss her. Yeah. And there's no, I guess there's no spark or it's a little bit awkward right after, but Speaker 3 00:22:59 Actually, yeah. Okay. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Keep going. I want to talk to, I want to talk about another kiss later on. Speaker 1 00:23:05 Okay. Okay. So there's two things that stood out to me, right. One was that awkward kiss itself where you kind of, you know, like there's a bittersweetness to it right. Where you're kind of like, oh, there wasn't any spark or, you know, um, it wasn't quite what she was thinking, but she also comments on the fact that he asked for permission and I couldn't quite decipher like how disappointed she was, because on one hand there is an element of disappointment in her tone, but then also, but, but then I can also see her trying to sort of understand that, of course, like, you know, like, yes, it's nice that he asked for permission, I guess. And so I kind of wanted to get your take on that if you're Speaker 3 00:23:58 Actually yeah. I, I, I vaguely remember that scene. I think I wasn't, because it was in the last episode and I wasn't really paying all that much attention to it. Yeah. It was the last episode. Oh yeah. Yeah. It was in the season finale. Um, so yeah. Yeah. And, um, yeah, I think like when I was listening, when I didn't actually dissect that episode in my mind, but now that you're seeing it, if it was, as you were, if it, if it was like, if it was played out, as you were saying it, that actually bothers me because I think, okay. I think the one thing that I do have a problem with is that like, and this is going to sound super preachy and I'm sorry, but the thing is, is that I think the one thing that I don't like about romcoms in the past is this whole, like, you know, you're going out, like, you know, like the, the heroine in the romcom is going out with like the other person that, you know, and then like they get swept up in it and then they like kiss and it's implied consent. Speaker 3 00:25:04 Right. It's implied mutual consent. And I think, and it's fine if that's the case, but the problem is is that when you go out into the real world, like, that's not how it is, and I'm sorry, but you should ask for permission before. Speaker 1 00:25:19 And this is why I think I was, it still stood out to me so much because I was kind of like, did you just sound too? Like, like, as in, I hope like it's one thing to discount the guy, because you didn't feel a spark with Speaker 3 00:25:34 Yeah, exactly. But you shouldn't discount him because he asked for permission because that's Speaker 1 00:25:39 The right thing Speaker 3 00:25:39 To do. Exactly. And actually they, like, people should be asking for permission before touching anybody. I'm sorry. Yes. Like 100%. Like, and I think it really bothers me this, and I've like, I've complained about this to other people, but like, it really bothers me when people who have children like forced them to hug. Other people do not do that. You're basically teaching them like, and I will go on rants about this forever, because what you're doing is you're teaching them that their body is not their own. And they do not have the right to tell people that they cannot touch them. Speaker 1 00:26:14 Actually be surprised. Like, I mean, no, you wouldn't be surprised. I'm sure you remember. Like, I, you know, it's happened a couple of times actually more than like, where like, like for example, um, went on a date, perfectly nice guy. Right. And, and, and yet, like this one time it was like, I'm getting up to, I was like, oh, excuse me. I'm just gonna run to the restroom as I'm getting up. He's like, hold on, hold on, hold on. I'm like what? And he just pulls me down and kisses me. It was the grossest thing ever. And the reason for that is because you just feel so violated and yet you're in the middle of a date and you're like, oh my God. And all these thoughts are going through your head. Like, oh, I can't like, you know, part of me is like mad at myself that why didn't I walk out? Speaker 1 00:27:03 You know? But part of me is like, but I sat through it. Like I sat through it. And then I remember this, this was like a, like a couple of years. So three years ago, maybe I just remember thinking like, oh my God, what the fuck just happened. Yeah. Right. Like, what was that like, why, why would you do that? It wasn't romantic. There wasn't anything fun. You know, like, yes, we were having a good conversation, a funny conversation, like, you know, and so I was actually kind of like, oh, this is a nice guy, you know? And that happened. And it was like a complete red flag in my oh yeah. Red flag, what just happened? And so I actually finished the date and then I like, but I didn't want him to walk me home at night. And so I was like, and I'm like, you know, I'm actually going to have to go this way, blah, blah, blah. And he's like, oh, I can walk. I'm like, no, no, no, no. You know, and, and, and then he goes, wait, are we going to see it? And I'm like, well, you know, let's keep it. Like, I was just, I don't know. It was like the most awkward thing right. Ever. And, um, it was terrible. Like, it, it really was terrible. And then, but I've also had like a couple of where you're like, am I, is it me? Am I just inviting this? Like, does it say somewhere in my face? Like you can just Speaker 3 00:28:27 Plant a kiss on me without consent Speaker 1 00:28:29 Or without my consent. Like, you know, like what kind of a fucking signal am I giving you here? Like, Speaker 3 00:28:35 And so that's the problem. Like, I think that's what, like, I'm being, I'm kind of being like gender. Like I'm kinda being gender biased in saying this, but like, but that's what women have been almost taught to like to think, right. Because if something like that happens too, you're like, what did I do? Was I wearing something different, some signal? What did I do? Like, I, I didn't ask for this. And yet I must've subliminally. Speaker 1 00:28:57 I was like, no, he didn't. And he Speaker 3 00:28:59 Didn't do anything. This is the other, person's like idiocy, like on their own. Like, you know, like they, they clearly have no respect for your boundaries. And it's a big Speaker 1 00:29:09 And flag. It is a big red flag, but that's just, it, I mean, I'm always going off on rants about these kinds of things. And even then I couldn't stop my thoughts and my feelings, because I was like shaming myself, because I'm like, SIM, did you like what? What's wrong with you? Like, did you do something or say something? Right. And, and so I agree, like, and that's the reason why, when she talked about it in a, in a particular way, I was kind of like, Hmm, like, yeah, like, like, like why call it out that he asked for permission? Like, Speaker 3 00:29:49 Oh, I know. And if he asks for permission, good on him, that is what you're supposed to be doing. Like, I don't. Yeah. Like, I mean, unless like, unless you can actually tell that they're giving you signals like you, and the thing is is you don't like, unless you're like a complete empath and you're like, somehow tuned into how they're thinking, you don't actually ever know, like you don't actually ever know. And you know what, take those two seconds and ask because like, yeah, like otherwise, like I just don't agree. Like, and I'm sure that there's going to be groups of people come at me and they'll be like, but where's the spontaneity. And there's like, you know, like it's supposed to be romantic and love is supposed to be, you know, like blah-blah-blah. And I'm like, yeah, but there's like a thin line between that and like rape, you know what I mean? Because that's what people say, right. When it comes to like sexual assaults, like while they were asking for it, it looks like they're asking for it. Yeah. And it's like, well, no, you didn't ask, did you? So you don't know, and you don't even get me started. Speaker 1 00:30:52 That's the reason why I think that that scene stood out to me a little bit where I was just like, wait, why I mentioned that at all. Like Speaker 3 00:30:58 Exactly. Yeah. And you know what I'm actually, if that, if I have to now you've made me interested because now I'm like, huh, maybe I should watch the season finale against Speaker 1 00:31:07 Right before when she calls SEMA. Um, you know, when, like that scene where Speaker 3 00:31:11 Yeah, no, no. I remember the kids. I remember the kids. Yeah. Yeah. And I remember him asking her, but like, I don't remember her being upset about him. Speaker 1 00:31:20 I couldn't tell if she's upset about it or not. That's the thing, like, it was played off in a very like, oh, when he asked for permission, but you know, she doesn't quite elaborate if it's a good thing or not. Oh yeah. That's why I was trying to be like, are you disappointed? You know, are, is there a moment of like, oh, it wasn't romantic? And like, what is yeah. Speaker 3 00:31:40 Yes, yes, yes. Okay. Actually, okay. I'm glad you brought it up because I think, okay. And I'm actually very disappointed with the writers, because I honestly think that there was an element of disappointment to it because that goes into my next comment, which was about her, the guy that she ends up with, who is like her, her podcast, producer Franklin. And remember that kiss in the elevator. I literally it's so funny because I was watching it and I was just like, oh, Speaker 1 00:32:12 I forget. Did I just tune it out? Speaker 3 00:32:14 I don't know. I don't know if you tuned it out, but like, honestly it was, and I'm sure everybody will be like, are you kidding me? Shit. He was hot. And she was into him and he was into her. And it's all good. But like, honestly, I don't know what it was about the fact that they kissed in the elevator, but I was just like, there is no buildup to this. I like, I get that, like, she's attractive and he's attractive, but that does not like the honestly had minimal chemistry and suddenly they're making out in a fucking elevator. And I was just like, what the fuck has happened? Speaker 1 00:32:42 And they like, the two of them needed Chait to leave before they felt it with each other. There was like, you know, Speaker 3 00:32:49 Exactly, exactly. He's been nonexistent for 10 fucking episodes. And then suddenly at the very end, she's like all hot for him. It makes no fucking sense. Speaker 1 00:32:59 It was like, Speaker 3 00:33:02 It was badly done. It was really bad. Speaker 1 00:33:04 Like even when he started talking to her at the wedding. Right. And it's like, who are you helping to remember? Cute. I did think that, but I was like, you know, because, and it was funny because even as a podcast producer, I was like, oh, you're cute. But then I forgot his face. Like, because they never really focused on him for anything. Right. Speaker 3 00:33:28 And the thing is, is that there was literally no chemistry between them. It seemed like a completely business transaction because they're at the wedding and she's all like, Hey, I didn't know that you were going to be here. And he was like, yeah, I was invited at the last minute. And then she's like, oh, and then, you know, he's like, you should become a, you should be, yeah, you should, you should have your own podcast. I'd love to this podcast or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You are the podcast like that voice. And it was just like, that's all he said and I'm sorry. It honestly sounded like a business transaction. Speaker 1 00:33:59 Exactly. And I was like, what voice? She sounds like any other normal person. Speaker 3 00:34:09 I know. I'm like, she sounds like an average person. Speaker 1 00:34:12 Yeah. Like I love her, you know, like, Carrie's awesome. Um, you know, and if I ever did any of the sex in the city quizzes, I would always get at least 50% carry. So I relate to her a lot. But, but, oh my God though, you know? Speaker 3 00:34:29 Yeah. No, I know. I know. It's why I had such a visceral reaction when they kiss. Speaker 1 00:34:34 We watch them. Cause I can't. Okay. So was the teacher at kiss scene in the last episode two, then it was oh, okay. Yes. Yes. Because she does call FEMA right after that. Yeah, yeah, Speaker 3 00:34:47 Yeah, Exactly. Speaker 1 00:34:52 To have that sex life. Speaker 3 00:34:54 I don't see my as literally living everyone's best life Speaker 1 00:34:58 And said when they met, you could feel, Speaker 3 00:35:01 You could feel the chemistry. Yeah. For them it was just like, they're hitting it there. Speaker 1 00:35:06 Literally. That's like, if you're going to talk about implied consent, they're like their eye contact with each other, literally off the screen. Right. Speaker 3 00:35:17 Exactly. You could tell, you could tell. I don't mean like podcast producer. I'm like what? Like, no, I mean, I get that you're hot, but at least have some buildup, but okay. Yeah. Sorry. Speaker 1 00:35:30 Is he like that? Generic hallmark. Good-looking hot. Speaker 3 00:35:35 I don't know. I don't watch the hallmark movies. So generic. What is it? I'm sorry. I know, I know we've had this discussion. Well, no. Cause cause every Christmas you talk about how you watched the whole Speaker 1 00:35:50 And if you give me that disdainful look like, I don't remember this now. Speaker 3 00:35:56 Yeah. Yeah. And, and yeah, like basically our, all of her friends talk about how you love the hallmark movies and none of us, Speaker 1 00:36:04 They're awful friends to have just for the record. Speaker 3 00:36:08 Did you hear that? Did you hear that everyone she's like denouncing it anyway Speaker 1 00:36:14 With my low brow tastes, Speaker 3 00:36:18 But anyway, to go back to this whole, like what did the writers intend? I honestly think that they did intend for Carrie to be kind of skeeved out by the, by the teacher asking for permission because the podcast producer did not ask for permission. They just started making. Speaker 1 00:36:38 Yeah. I, I think I must've tuned that scene out because I think I was kind of like still thinking about the first of all SEMA. I really was. I wasn't sure If I am still single at 50, is she 53? She just had turned 53. She Speaker 3 00:36:58 Turned 53. Speaker 1 00:37:00 So I'm like, if I am still single at that stage, I want to be having that kind of sex. Speaker 3 00:37:05 I just want to look Speaker 1 00:37:06 Like her, like her. I want her hair. I do want her there. And I want to be having that sex life because that's at least 10 times better than my Speaker 3 00:37:20 Hashtag relationship goals. Speaker 1 00:37:23 Completely hashtag age goals. Hashtag brown girl goals have so many goals. Patel is my hero now Speaker 3 00:37:37 I know. Yeah, no I know. But they asked so yeah, just to go back to, yeah. So basically just to go back, I think, I think they were implying that and actually I'm kind of upset at the writers for implying that because that's, that's the kind of backwards thinking that has kind of led to Speaker 1 00:37:54 Situation that really did bother me, but I was kind of see even, and look at, look at how I'm still conditioned. Like I couldn't actually articulate it out or say it out loud. Right. I'm like, oh, what did you think about it? Like I'm slipping, kneeling out. If I have a support in there, out there, you know what I can actually say that actually Speaker 3 00:38:17 Bothered me. It really bothered me. I Speaker 1 00:38:20 Thought when he asked for permission that it was actually suite, Speaker 3 00:38:24 I thought it was sweet too. I thought that was really like, he was into her and he was asking whether or not he could kiss her. I thought nothing. You know, that's the funny thing, is that nothing I was thinking about it. I was watching that and I was like, I know they're trying to make me think that there's no chemistry here, but weirdly I can't get over the fact that they've had all these connections through all these dates they seem to get along. And I actually felt there was more chemistry between her and this teacher. Then that's EDS, like podcast or producer. I was like, what the fuck are you trying to tell me here? I'm watching with my own eyes is not what you're trying to tell me. Speaker 1 00:38:58 Exactly. So here's the thing. So, um, did you ever read a book called how to be single and um, I think they tried to make a movie out of it. It was, um, uh, sort of like a weird self-help ask kind of a book, but not really like, you know, I forget the name of the author, but the book stayed with me because I was very annoyed because they kind of touch on different cultures, um, uh, like sex and love or you know, of different cultures. Oh, sorry. That was my phone. Um, different cultures, different age groups. So, you know, but you know, at the end of the book though, I just felt that the conclusion was that 18 year old girl is wanting and looking for the same thing as a 28 year old. Who's looking for the same thing as a 38 year old and a 48 or like, you know what I mean? Speaker 1 00:39:53 Like I feel there was no growth and, and it was so full of stereotypes and cliches. Uh, it was a well-written book though. I have to give you that. But the underlying message was exactly how I felt about this like particular scene and the issues around it was that women are all looking for the same thing. And it's all like the stereotypes was like, you know, they were all like, like, you know, the Italians are the passionate lovers and the Americans are the brash open, direct, uh, guys. And when you date a French man, like they will cheat on you because that's just what it is. But they're so sophistic and culture. Do you know what I mean? Like every stereotype you can think of, like, there was no leeway for us. Like there was no things that said that, you know, a 58 year old woman might want to might very well be giddy and act like an 18 year old in love with if, and when they like, she falls in love. Speaker 1 00:40:52 But at the same time, maybe a 25 year old is actually going to be very mature about it or wants something completely different. Like, you know what I mean? Like it was just, I dunno, anyway, so it just reminded me of that book and how annoyed I felt about this lack of growth and caring in this scene where I was like, are we still supposed to want the exact same thing we wanted at 20? Five-year-olds like watching those romcoms and like, you know, where a guy just push it, licking geo. I mean, like, as in no consent asked for a given, but somehow magically, they know that, you know, you want them to kiss you and they, the goes for it. Like where's, there's no appreciation at least, you know, like, I guess we might want it at some point or some, you know, whatever, but, but how can you not appreciate or show growth in your thinking that, Hey, that's actually a really nice thing that he did, but despite that there was just no chemistry between us, right? Like there's no chemistry, Speaker 3 00:41:56 Better friends. Then we would, you know, like Speaker 1 00:42:01 Exactly the no chemistry between us. But in this case, I felt that they equated asking for permission with no chemistry. Speaker 3 00:42:08 I know. And I think if that's the way. Yeah. And if that is the way that it plays out, which I think it does just because of that last scene between her and the podcast producer, I have a big problem with that. It's funny that no one's mentioned it. I have actually not seen it mentioned in any of the articles, the show, well, you heard it here first, Speaker 1 00:42:33 But on that note now I feel like I've need to rewatch that last episode. Speaker 3 00:42:38 Yeah. Yeah. And it's really funny because like I actually watched the last episode, like after like all the think pieces had been written about it and stuff, and I still remember my visceral reaction to that kiss. I was like, literally disgusted. I was just like, they ha like, why, why is he like forcing himself on her? I'm like, they have no chemistry. And suddenly he's like in an elevator, like forcing himself on her. This is not right. Like I literally, I literally, like I was sitting on the couch. Speaker 1 00:43:08 I actually don't remember that scene at all. Speaker 3 00:43:11 Oh, that's so funny. Yeah, because I was literally sitting on the seat with my partner and I went, which is not what everybody else has been writing about. They're like, yay. And I'm like, this is gross. Speaker 1 00:43:24 See, that's funny. I'm like, I actually don't remember the scene. Speaker 3 00:43:27 Oh, oh wow. You just like, just to reset it from your memory. We know Speaker 1 00:43:31 This happens a lot. Speaker 3 00:43:33 I watch it again. Speaker 1 00:43:36 I am, I'm going to rewatch this when I actually get some time. Speaker 3 00:43:40 Um, yeah. But I do remember distinctly thinking. It's very interesting that they're trying to show me that there's no chemistry between her and the teacher, because there was no like swelling music in the background and stuff. Speaker 1 00:43:50 And we thought that they were having fun. And I thought, I thought it was very sweet. Like the, you know, the, the way they were with each other. Um, and it might not be passionate and that's fine. And she doesn't have to settle for him now. That's um, you know, if that's what she thinks she would be doing of course, but like to be so dismissive about it right away. Because I don't know. Speaker 3 00:44:16 Yeah, no, exactly. And if, and if she does equate the lack of passion with the faculty that he sent, Speaker 1 00:44:23 Oh, now I need to know, but I'm like, am I misinterpreting it or did I read too much into it? But like, I just thought it was so weird that she called it out and told Sima, oh, he asked for consent. And I'm like, Hmm, what is that wrong? Speaker 3 00:44:38 You mean, he's doing what he should be Speaker 1 00:44:40 Like is wrong really. And if you thought it was wrong, then, uh, uh, you know, yeah. Speaker 3 00:44:48 And you know, the funny thing is I have dated guys, who've talked about that like first kiss situation and like, um, like a lot of them have actually asked for consent before kissing me, which is very nice. And I appreciate it. And like, but like when I've talked about it with them, like, I think a lot of guys do have a lot of pressure around that moment. Right. Like when the kids don't you go in for the kids, Speaker 1 00:45:14 Can I just ask? And it doesn't have to be unromantic. It doesn't take away from it. You know? Like, like just be like, oh, you know? Yeah. Speaker 3 00:45:24 Because if she's really into you, Speaker 1 00:45:27 She will be delighted. Speaker 3 00:45:29 Exactly. Yeah, exactly. And it won't matter, like the fact that you asked, like, honestly, she'll forget because she'll just be so happy that like you're kissing her Speaker 1 00:45:38 And there is an element of that pressure from you too, right. Like on, on, on the woman's side as well. Yeah. It's kind of like, oh my gosh, is he going to, is he not talking to her? Right. So it's kind of like, you know yeah. Speaker 3 00:45:52 And Speaker 1 00:45:52 It's true. I think it's a sweet thing. Speaker 3 00:45:55 Yeah, yeah, yeah. No. And I mean, I've had guys go in for the kiss and then I back away. Cause I'm just like, Speaker 1 00:46:03 Yeah, exactly. It's like, if you couldn't hell no, this is not. Yeah, no I've had that too. But there were two, two episodes that really stand out where I was like, what the hell? Like where me? Like, I didn't see it coming. Yeah. And that was very problematic because you really go down this like, oh, first of all, you feel gross, you know? And, and thank God. It didn't neither one of those where like anything beyond that, you know, but you do feel very violated. Speaker 3 00:46:38 No, no doubt, no doubt. And like, and then the shame spiral, you go down afterwards, you know, like, and it's just so not warranted because you didn't do anything. It was not your fault. You know? Like it's just, yeah. Anyway, so all this to say, please ask for consent. Speaker 1 00:46:54 I heartedly concur. Speaker 3 00:46:57 Yeah, exactly. Yeah. So anyway, I don't think that there's anything that I can think of. Oh, although we should go back to the whole, like, speaking of love, the big thing, which is the fact that Miranda and Steve have dissolved their marriage basically. Right. I mean, Speaker 1 00:47:17 Um, because I mean, I don't know about you, but I did. I was one of those people who thought that she shouldn't have married him in the first place when the sex and the city originally, it was on like, um, she never treated him. Right. Speaker 3 00:47:33 Well, and he cheated on her and I don't forget that. Right. Yeah. Speaker 1 00:47:37 Yeah. And, and they just were like, I felt like they, like, he just wanted, the key just was like, why can't do better than her kind of a thing. She was kind of like, I want to settle down. Like, I'm, I'm, you know, and I'm going to settle for Steve. Like, that's how I felt. Speaker 3 00:47:56 Yeah. Plus they had that plus they had a child together too. Right. Speaker 1 00:48:00 Yeah. Which was very disappointing. And maybe this is the reason why I'm kind of, you know, like Miranda was never my full favorite, even though I loved the fact that she was a career woman. Um, but it was like, I think I was just always like, oh, you compromise too much. Like you give up too much, you know, like you're, you're being giving into like, basically all these expected milestones because I think you should be doing. Speaker 3 00:48:27 Yeah. But I think that was addressed in this new reboot because at the end, she's, you know, she, she takes a huge leap. She gets like, you know, she gets this internship, gives it up in order to be with chase. Speaker 3 00:48:43 But like, so she gets this pilot in California. And so Miranda decides to go with them to, um, to be with them. Right. And I think that, like, I don't know, I find it show growth for the character because it's true. Like Miranda follows these rigid rules. Everything has to be a certain way. And like now she's just kind of blowing it all up. And the thing is, I don't think it'll, I don't think it'll go well, I don't think that this relationship with chase is actually going to like, become like the permanent relationship, but you know what, that's her journey. That's like what she needs to learn and that's fine. Like, I think it's, I think it's great, like Speaker 1 00:49:16 True, but disagree with why I'm doing this because I'm in love. I don't know. I was a little bit annoyed. Mm. I think, uh, I think, uh, the fact that she already did something incredibly on Miranda, like, which is quite hard job. Yeah. You know, she's trying to be an ally. Um, she's, you know, taking those courses, she got that internship and, and it's, I'm glad that she's following, um, them too, like, as in, like, she's not giving up on the relationship with them, but the fact is that the internship would have been a small period of time, you know, and, and right. Like, I'm assuming it would be like three months, six months, whatever. Right. Um, Speaker 3 00:50:09 I don't know. I just assumed I assumed internships or at least a Speaker 1 00:50:11 Year. Oh, I guess. But she's in school. How could they be for a whole year? Oh, Speaker 3 00:50:18 I dunno. Can't you take time out just to do an internship and then pop back in, Speaker 1 00:50:22 I guess. But I assumed like, if it was a, I guess I made the assumption that if it was a school, like a school supported internship, it would be like over a certain period of like three to six months. Cause then you'd have to come back and finish the program. Right? Speaker 3 00:50:41 No, I just assumed if it was like a competitive internship would be kind of like a road scholarship where you're just like, you know, you go to carrier a year or two and like get something done and then, Speaker 1 00:50:51 Oh yeah. Maybe Mia you're right. It could be. Um, and, uh, but, but I don't know. I think I was just like, oh my gosh, you have this opportunity, which you already took a leap of faith by quitting your job and like wanting to do this. Right. And, and you're derailing yourself. Or maybe I'm just angry at her for like, not prioritizing her own, you know, maybe it took me projecting my own. Speaker 3 00:51:18 I know. I'm just like, what's the problem here. Speaker 1 00:51:22 I'm like, why are you being such an idiot for someone else? Speaker 3 00:51:29 But she isn't, she's doing, she's technically doing it for herself because This person makes her happy. And I think she wants to be with them. Right. Like I think that's Speaker 1 00:51:40 Yeah, no, that's fair. That's a very fair comment. Speaker 3 00:51:44 Are you just upset that she's allowed to blow up her life and you feel, and you feel like you can't blow up? Speaker 1 00:51:52 You're right. How dare you, how dare you take that leap of faith without Speaker 3 00:52:02 I know, meanwhile, I'm like, you go Miranda, you live your best life. I know, but I have been reading a lot of like reviews and a lot of like comments about how, like she's blown up her marriage to Steve. And I'm like, Speaker 1 00:52:18 Why marriage with Steve? I know Speaker 3 00:52:21 That's the thing. I'm like, why would you want them to be in this zombie marriage? Just for the sake of being married? Speaker 1 00:52:30 I think I had no problem with her blowing up her marriage, what, Steve, I had a problem with how she did it, where she just literally, after 15 years of being with this person, like, you know, there's no, check-in like, do you know what I mean? Like, as in, um, they allude to the fact that, you know, like Steve and Steve came to the paintings thing in the, with, at the, uh, you know, the culture and the ultimate episode. Yeah. Um, and things like that. But, uh, so clearly they're staying in touch, but there was just no, you know, kindness and compassion towards Sam a little bit, you know, like the whole breakup thing, like, which I thought was a little bit, um, cold for Miranda overall. Um, but I thought that Miranda's Speaker 3 00:53:19 Ever been a Speaker 1 00:53:20 Warm person. That's true. But then I didn't expect, but no, like the fact that that marriage needed to end, I just similar to a number of other issues where I felt like they rushed through those things. Yeah. Dissolving a marriage is work and yes, you might have an epiphany. You might know what you want. But, um, the process itself is, is, is it requires a little bit more, you know, back and forth if you will, a little bit. Speaker 3 00:53:49 Yeah. But I have a feeling that that's just because of where they wanted to get to in the show. Because like, I mean, if you think about this, those 10 episodes have taken a year. Right. And like, and I think that like, like maybe what you were looking for is the stuff is the work that went on in those intervening months between like quote episodes. Cause like, I think like the work that needs to go into a marriage may not necessarily be good TV. Like I'm not, not, they got not the work to go into good marriage, but like into dissolving that marriage, like it's not necessarily good TV. Right. There's just kind of like, okay, like we know you're breaking up. I don't need to see all of the grittiness, the nitty gritty of it. Speaker 1 00:54:32 Yeah. No, that's true. You don't need to see the nitty gritty of it, but maybe I just expected a little bit more, little more interaction, I guess, uh, you know, between the two, like the way Steve talked to Carrie, that was heartbreaking overall. Right. Like when he was trying to find out what, why, how, um, you know, but there was no followup of that, like Carrie talking to Miranda and saying, Steve wants to know, or, you know, there was no consequence to it, you know? Yeah, Speaker 3 00:55:04 Yeah, yeah. I know you would've thought that carry Speaker 1 00:55:07 Disjointed and that's what it is. Like all these parts were disjointed about the breakup. Speaker 3 00:55:13 Yeah, yeah. Yeah. I mean, maybe that was like a writing flaw there, but yeah, Speaker 1 00:55:19 No, I, I think it's, it's, uh, like I said, like to me, this feels like they have th there's quite a few good things going on and if they're willing to flesh those pieces out, I think it would be a great, like, it would probably start being a fun, fun show, like a really fun show. Speaker 3 00:55:35 Exactly. I kind of feel it's really hard to do, especially when there's only 10 episodes worth of a show, because I don't know. I feel like showrunners and writers are kind of in between a rock and a hard place because you kind of want to get the story going. And I think what we were all expecting was like, oh, it's going to be like the old times, you know, except they're now in their fifties, like, let's find out what that's about. But the thing is is that you kind of like big had to die. And then Speaker 1 00:56:07 Just for the record, Speaker 3 00:56:08 I, yeah, I think a lot of people would have made me that's not true. Yeah. Yeah. Because the thing is is that like, you can't have a new show without Carrie being single, so big would have to go somehow. So it was either divorce or death. Right. Speaker 1 00:56:22 What we were talking about. Yeah. Speaker 3 00:56:25 So then the thing is, is that like you only have 10 episodes to kind of like push through plot in and make in order to kind of get to where you want to be. So I think, I feel like what's happened is they've kind of pushed through the plot in order to get the women into their respective places so that you can now move forward with stories going into the future. Speaker 1 00:56:50 Right. Well, I certainly hope that's the case. Um, I don't know if they've renewed the show, but if they have, I mean, obviously I'll be watching. So, um, Speaker 3 00:57:00 Yeah, exactly. I got as, as of, as of yet, I don't know that they've actually said anything about what the show going to be renewed. Yeah. Speaker 1 00:57:08 And I certainly hope that they do start focusing on the love and sex part of the show. Speaker 3 00:57:14 That's what we watched the show for. Like, oh, I did, I did not watch the show to watch him Brady have sex. Thanks. Speaker 1 00:57:23 I know. Oh gosh. On that note, we should probably call this an episode. Yep. Speaker 3 00:57:31 I think so. Speaker 1 00:57:32 Um, find us, um, you know, uh, it's, it's, it's been fun. We'll um, you know, next week we'll be back and we promise it will be a fresh new topic, I think watched, uh, and dissected, uh, just like that. Uh, and just like that, uh, quite a bit, but, you know, we did think that it touched on a lot of age-related stuff, so wanting to cover those off, um, and, and share our thoughts, but we will be back next week with, uh, a different episode in the meantime, connect with us on social email and we'll go to our website as well. Does this make me look old.com? Speaker 3 00:58:11 Yeah. Um, and then, yeah, feel free to find our, uh, social handles on that website and email us at, does this make me look [email protected] we'd like to hear from you and yeah, I guess we'll see you next Speaker 1 00:58:21 Week. Bye. Bye.