Episode Transcript
Speaker 1 00:00:03 Hi, and welcome to does this make me local, a podcast about aging as gracefully as possible when you're just not ready for two 40 something year old friends will find themselves kind of straddling that really odd period of time when aging and everything that it's associated with is starting to become a much bigger part of our lives. We're definitely curious, but at the same time, rather terrified about aging. I'm Schiff. I'm a health science nerd and pop culture themes, and I'm SIM and adult and waiting obsessed with finance and self-help books. We're going to be talking about the stereotypes of aging and how they affect us. And we'll also be doing some deeper dives into some interesting topics, such as what it's like to get old in the society dating when you're older and scientific advancements in anti-aging products and even evolution and scientific thinking around aging and throughout it all we chat rant laugh about or adulting mishaps of which there are so, so, so many. So join us as we navigate our second quarter life crisis.
Speaker 0 00:01:09 Hi, welcome to this episode. This week's episode of does this make me look old?
Speaker 2 00:01:14 Hey, Shiv, how's it going? Not bad. How are you? Oh, tired, but good. I guess.
Speaker 0 00:01:21 Oh, that's good. Well, at least it's at least you're not just tired
Speaker 2 00:01:27 On a new approach these days where I'm going to try and be more positive. I'm going to start off that way. Who knows how I can, how long I will survive and how my, you know, how long I can sustain it. And I will attempt to be as positive as possible.
Speaker 0 00:01:50 I think that's fair. Oh my gosh. That's impressive. Okay. When did you start this?
Speaker 2 00:01:57 Oh, just now
Speaker 0 00:02:00 I wasn't thinking, oh, you know, he'd been doing it for a week and it was going really well. Like your outlook, it deferred or something.
Speaker 2 00:02:07 No, I just started, um, you know, it was just stupid crap. I needed to spout because when I, when I was like, oh, I'm good. And then I'm like, I don't know why I said that. <inaudible>
Speaker 0 00:02:25 So ready. We're off to a great start. <inaudible> Goodness. Anyway,
Speaker 2 00:02:34 Uber work king, I'm doing, you know, I think I'm just tired. And on top of that, it was my dad's birthday weekend. And so we did a little family trip getaway a little bit of time with my parents, which was lovely, except, you know, my mother may have shared her anxiety about getting older listing, like things, you know, that she hates about the process like, oh, you know, physically this happened and that happened to her and she's very upset about it. And so then of course, that sent me down a little mental rabbit hole of she's my mother, if genetics have any hand
Speaker 0 00:03:30 In 20 years, this is what's happening to me.
Speaker 2 00:03:33 I know. And I'm a little bit stressed about the whole thing.
Speaker 0 00:03:39 Oh my goodness. Okay. So, so like what, so what, what were some of the things that she was saying where you're like, oh my God, that could happen to me too, or that has already happened to me and I'm worried about it.
Speaker 2 00:03:48 Well, you know, I'd let let's, I feel like we should make an episode out of that. So like, as in this episode, so maybe you can sort of talk because now those are my fears. So maybe we should, um, and I'm curious to know if you actually have this, because apparently now I do, like, we should just list, transferred
Speaker 0 00:04:05 Her anxieties to you.
Speaker 2 00:04:08 My mother, I love her. I'll give you guys the context of this, like the story of how we got there, but like maybe today, while we can do, um, Shiv is, is, um, talk about the signs of aging that we've noticed in us. Like, you know, I don't know, top five or maybe top is not the right word, but like, if you have five, I don't know. But if you have I'll, I'll go with that too, but yeah.
Speaker 0 00:04:35 Okay. I'll have, I'll have to think about this sometimes. I think I'm like diluting myself into thinking I'm younger than me.
Speaker 2 00:04:45 So while you do that, while you think I'll give you the background on why this topic is top of mind today. Okay. So, um, while we were like, you know, so we went to deer Hurst, resorts up north, and, um, it's a lovely little area and, you know, gorgeous views and, and like beautiful trails and all of that. And
Speaker 0 00:05:09 Is it forced to use a hilly or like what's the
Speaker 2 00:05:12 Sort of hilly and the sort of foresty? My mother being, um, very representative of my family, the rest of my family. Uh, we didn't actually venture out into the nature. We looked at it, um, you know, the window
Speaker 0 00:05:38 They're outside in the
Speaker 2 00:05:40 Outdoors. And that was, um, you know, yes, we did make it outdoors. Very proud of that. So gorgeous to look at this gorgeous view, you know, like you have the lake and the waters and Hills and, and, you know, like just, it was very beautiful, but anyway, so it was like taking pictures and stuff like that. And then, you know, the sun just hit my mom at a certain angle. And so I was like, oh mom, you should drink some more water your skins or put some face cream on because your face is so dry. And number
Speaker 0 00:06:13 One, like
Speaker 2 00:06:17 How did you know that?
Speaker 0 00:06:19 I think it's, that's how I would react. I'd be like, DRI, excuse me.
Speaker 2 00:06:25 Wow. You are already dealing with this. My mother lost it. He was like, she just turned and it's the coldest voice ever. Like, I feel like I've never heard her use a colder voice, um, where she just says, that's just my skin it's wrinkled. Okay. I swear to God, it was like the night king and his like soldiers or whatever those things creatures were whites. Whites. I forget now is that a couple of years ago anyway. Um, so it, it was literally like they had just come over and taken over the entire balcony angry and I was like, oh, no, like, no, your skin's not that wrinkled. Well, she got
Speaker 0 00:07:23 Wrinkled. Oh shit. Okay. Yeah. I'm sorry, dude. You're on your own. Did everyone leave you? Was it like, did it like, was it like one of those westerns where everybody like cleared out?
Speaker 2 00:07:35 Um, you know, it might as well have been because I feel like my dad just smirked and didn't say he was no help.
Speaker 0 00:07:43 Oh no, no, no. You never enter into the battle. No, you, you, everyone clears out. It's like tumbleweeds. The only thing that slipped around are tumbleweeds
Speaker 2 00:07:54 And then yeah, no, that was, that was one of the stories where, you know, and then she started talking about like the fact that, you know, oh, you'll know when you get to my age and, and in this happens, which is why I tell you lose weight and get healthy now and do this. And I was like, how it got turned around on, you know, it was so, you know, um, so anyway, but it got me thinking because then, you know, we obviously, um, talked about some of these other things that she's noticed about herself because every time we took pictures, she wanted to make sure that she looked good in it. And she, you know, she wanted to talk about like, you know, whether her hair looked full enough or the wrinkles, uh, you know, or hers didn't look as wrinkly, I guess. So all of these different things that we have to go through.
Speaker 2 00:08:52 And anyway, it got me thinking though that, oh my God, um, you know, a, I'm probably going to turn into my mother. Um, there are a number of scenarios where I actually do similar things because of similar reasons. There are things that I think like, oh my God, like I'm getting old, um, physically like physical signs, uh, of me getting old that bothered me or that I think about and what I do, I'm like, oh no. And so on, those are things I actually do watch out for and pictures and that's exactly what my mother was doing. So, um, so yeah, so here I am
Speaker 0 00:09:37 Worried about aging
Speaker 2 00:09:39 Hallways.
Speaker 0 00:09:42 I know I'm like, actually that's like pretty much the premise of this entire podcast.
Speaker 2 00:09:47 And I honestly don't understand, like, it's fantastic that, you know, I, you know, and I feel like I'm making progress. Um, you're better about this than I am, but I feel like I am making progress about you're like, I haven't gotten old at all. I, yeah, exactly. But I came across a letter that I had written to someone when I was 20. I never mailed it out, which by the way, I have so many Christmas cards and things that I, or birthday cards and Christmas cards and letters that I've never ever mailed out.
Speaker 0 00:10:25 Oh, I do the same thing I have. Like, thank you cards. I'd never,
Speaker 2 00:10:29 No, thank you cards as well. But anyway, I found this one letter and it was a few weeks before my 21st birthday. I kid you not, I had written there that, oh my gosh, it's my birthday in a couple of weeks. But maybe if I pretend that it it's not coming around, then I won't get a year older. That Ben it's pretty sad.
Speaker 0 00:10:56 Yeah. So basically this anxiety has just been with you for ever
Speaker 2 00:11:01 Clearly for more reasons. But anyway, but that's a different topic. So today I thought we should talk about, you know, like, do you actually, first of all, do you even have those? So you're diluted, but yeah.
Speaker 0 00:11:17 Diluted, like, I think the only, okay, the one thing I will say, so gray hair, isn't a thing for me per se, because I went, I was starting to go. I know, but the thing is, the reason it isn't for me is because I started going gray so young that like, it doesn't even phase me. I'm just kind of like, whatever. Like I think I started getting gray hairs, like when I was like 25 and I had like, just, I was like, okay, well you've gone gray. Like you have to die this now. And so then, like, I just, it just became part of my routine.
Speaker 2 00:11:49 Did you not think of like where you not freaked out the first time you saw it?
Speaker 0 00:11:56 I must've been, but honestly I don't remember anymore. Like, it was so long ago. I don't remember anymore. And I've just like come to grips with it. So like it doesn't phase me. Oh yeah. It's weird. It's weird. The only thing is, is that like with the pandemic, because I couldn't dye my hair anymore and that freaked me out. Cause I was like, oh Jesus, I've gotten like really gray. Cause like, you know, I've got like the, I've got like the strips of like white hair that like frame my face type thing. So like that kind of freaked me out, but then I just resumed dying it again. And it was just like, I don't know. I don't know. So like, I can't really use it as I can as an example because I don't know. It doesn't bother me as much.
Speaker 2 00:12:42 Okay. So I'm going to start with this then. Okay. So number one, right. And oh yeah, I have this new sound effect that I wanted to use and we use this aging sign that freaked me out. Number one.
Speaker 0 00:13:01 Oh, that's too
Speaker 2 00:13:01 Funny. That was my gray hair. I have to admit, I was like, what is this? Why is this? When did this happen? I had so many questions. Um, and I still don't have the answers. It's funny because I actually love the look of silver hair. Yeah. Especially like I like salt and pepper look and I love the Lily Munster. Look that Stacy from, um, what not to wear, had to remember that. Yeah. I always thought she looked amazing. Um, so I actually liked the lope, but I really found it difficult to adapt to it when it first happened to me.
Speaker 0 00:13:38 Yeah. So I'm sure it bothered me on some level, but then like when I go to my, okay. So when I went to my hairstylist now, it's just like, okay, I've gone gray. Like I need to hide this. But then like, I think it's because they were so supportive that like, it didn't phase me anymore. Cause like, I think the first time I, I went, somebody was just like, oh, you only have like 5% grays. That gets nothing. And then they were like, we can use a semipermanent dive for this. You don't even need to go permanent. Like, you're fine. And so I was just like, oh, okay. That's okay.
Speaker 2 00:14:11 Send me permanent dye.
Speaker 0 00:14:13 Oh. So semi permanent dye, like washes out after six weeks. And so like permanent dial you'll have like a line. So semi-permanent die. Like you still kind of have like a little bit of a line, but it's like more gradual. It doesn't look as, I don't know, it doesn't look as harsh basically. And so yeah, this is what I'm understanding. I am not a hairstylist nor a colorist. This is my interpretation.
Speaker 2 00:14:37 Yeah. And this is how much I outsource every shift. Just tell me what it is.
Speaker 0 00:14:46 So then, um, yeah, so, so yeah, so I think that's what happened when I first started going gray. So like, it didn't really phase me cause I was like, oh wait, when they only see like 5%, I get such a small percentage. That's fine. Like I can handle that. And apparently you don't seem to think that's a big deal. So I'm not going to think it's a big deal either. Right. And any other things, I know how it helps having very supportive hairstylists. And then the other thing was, uh, after the pandemic, my hair was like actually like fairly white and like inches and inches because I hadn't gone in for months. And then I was like talking to my hairstylist then. And then I was like, yeah, I don't know. Like, should we do something where I like mix the gray in with like, you know, blonde highlights so that it looks like, yeah, I don't know. I was trying to figure out something to do with it, like so that I could like race the gray and be okay with being old. And then he was just like, but you're so young, why would you do this? And I was just like, oh, okay. All right.
Speaker 0 00:15:47 That's great. I'm not, but
Speaker 2 00:15:51 That's awesome. Okay. So, so that's not a thing for you, but no, for me it really is. And it's just one of those things where now, cause it's, it's weird. Right? Like I think for the, for the first few months I was kind of like, okay, this is strange because they were more on the top of my hair. So it was like more of the bop, like, you know, like, um, and so it didn't feel as real, but now they're more of the side of my temples and I'm like, this is not pretty. Or maybe it is, I don't know, a little bit better with it. But, um, the fact that you think that you don't remember, like over time you've gotten used to it that's actually, um, gives me hope. So maybe I'll, I'll feel comfortable with it too. Um, in about 10 years.
Speaker 0 00:16:45 Yeah. I think I got pretty used to it pretty quickly. Like I dunno. It just, yeah. When I don't know, I don't know why. I think I have to tell you it's yeah. I have a feeling it's because my hairdressers were just like, this is nothing calm the fuck down. Yeah.
Speaker 2 00:17:06 Okay. No, no, that's good. Um, what about your number one then? Um, physical signs that may told you crap I'm getting old.
Speaker 0 00:17:15 Yeah. Yeah. So I guess the one thing which is like an ongoing thing, it hasn't like completely, I don't think it's completely affected me, but like is, um, dear God, I only know the medical term. Okay. Hang on. I'm going to tell you the medical term and I'm explain it because I TA I can't think of like what it is in layman's terms. Okay. So, okay. So it's like presbyopia, so then it's like, Okay, so I'm gonna explain it. And then like, if you remember what the layman's term for it is, then let me know. So basically, um, yeah, so it's presbyopia is like, so now I'm starting to realize that, and this happens to everybody sadly, but like, um, it's the reason you need reading glasses is because you cannot focus on print. Like when it's near you, you have to actually like move it further away in order for like the letter.
Speaker 2 00:18:13 Yeah, yeah, yeah. You become nearsighted, is it? Or do you become
Speaker 0 00:18:19 No, no, no. So thanks for your so you're you're nearsighted or farsighted. It doesn't matter, but this is because like the muscles in your eye that actually focus the lens in your eye are actually getting weaker over time. And so, so everyone gets this regardless of whether or not they're near or farsighted. So like, by the time you hit in your forties, yeah. This is what starts happening, which is why everyone needs. And everyone, mostly everyone needs like bifocals. Um, it happens, I think at different rates, at different people, but like in your forties, that's, what's starting to happen. So I was just like, shit, it's starting to happen. I mean, I'm still okay. I went to like my eye doctors and I was just like, yeah, I'm, I'm starting to sense that like, I need to like, look at things. I need to look at like menus and things like a little bit further than I normally used to, like, I'm doing that whole, like, I'm going to say, oh, like, this is probably derogatory, but like old person thing where you're just like, oh, I can't read at my normal distance. And so they like, you're pulling the menu further and further away from you. And then yeah. But then like, yeah, they checked it and they're like, it's actually not that bad. You probably don't need bike bifocals for a while. I'm like, oh, okay. But you know, it's coming. I'm like, it's a ticking time bomb.
Speaker 2 00:19:27 So can you point it out if I'm doing that too? Because I feel like, I don't know. I can't remember. Like, I don't think I noticed it yet.
Speaker 0 00:19:35 Yeah. I don't know, like eat something that only you would know, because like, if, if you're
Speaker 2 00:19:41 Like Mimi moving the menu away, you would know.
Speaker 0 00:19:48 Yeah. Okay. You don't notice that you're doing it. Like when you're reading books or something that you don't find that you're like changing the distance that you're reading it.
Speaker 2 00:19:57 I just don't know. I don't think I noticed it by also move around, like when I'm reading. Okay. This is weird when I read, I read in bed. Right. And I change positions all the time because sometimes I'll turn this way, turn, sometimes I'll turn that way. And um, so I guess I just didn't, I don't notice, like I didn't notice. Well, not that I don't notice. I haven't noticed is the right thing to say, uh, if I've moved it away, you know, like as an, for, for distance purposes, I don't think I've noticed that.
Speaker 0 00:20:27 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's starting to happen and I need more light to look at things now. Like I've just, I used to be able to like see things in dim light, but like now, and I remember it was so funny. Cause like I remember I would always read in dim light. It didn't matter. And then my parents would always be like, turn up the light, you, you more light to read and I'd be like, what are you talking about? Like, I, I can still see the words, but now I can't like now I need very high exposure to be exposed to like large quantities of light to be like, oh, that's what
Speaker 2 00:21:02 I do think I do need that. Oh my gosh. It wasn't even on my list.
Speaker 0 00:21:10 Oh, sorry. So yeah. I think that's like, one of the things I've noticed is like, oh yeah, I remember. And I had this friend, like she's, she's five years older than me. And so like when she hit her forties, she was just like, you wait, it's going to happen to you. You're gonna, you're going to start to like, you know, it's like the need for bifocals basically, which is like, you, you end up with presbyopia. And I was just like, oh God, I was like, I'd been dreading it. And then like suddenly it started happening and it was just like, fuck. Yeah. And I think my problem is is that I usually work contacts. And so, yeah. But like, oh, and then this is also, uh, the, uh, this is also a sign that you're getting older. So, um, I, I go to a couple of different optometrists and like one of the optometrists has my email address.
Speaker 0 00:22:01 And so then they were starting this clinical trial where they were looking at. So, so okay. On the one hand. Yay. Because my issue was, is like I wear contacts and then if I get presbyopia, that would mean I would need like either glasses on top of my contacts or I would just need to wear bifocals. And I'm like, I refuse to wear bifocals. And I'm like, what do I do? Because I have like, um, and there are contacts that serve the purpose of bifocals, but they're only for people who don't have a stigmatism. And of course me, I have astigmatism. So I was just like, fuck, like of course I get fucked over. So I was just like, yay. When I get older and I need bifocals, I won't be able to wear contacts anymore. And so then like in my early forties, actually, maybe like a couple of years ago, I got this email from my optometrist and they're like, we're starting a clinical trial for like people who have astigmatism and wear contacts where we're like, they're like trialing these kinds of bifocal contacts where people with astigmatism. So on the one hand I was like, yay. I can potentially still wear contacts. On the other hand, I was like, yay. You think I'm old enough to meet?
Speaker 0 00:23:11 So that was a, that was an existential crisis.
Speaker 2 00:23:14 What about laser surgery? Does that help Lee LASIK?
Speaker 0 00:23:20 Yeah. No, because yeah, because LASIK actually takes off like slivers off of your cornea in order to like it, it just works in a different way. This is because it's like a muscle issue and not like a lens issue. Got it. Yeah.
Speaker 2 00:23:34 Wow. Okay. Well that is a serious one. And thanks for adding to my list.
Speaker 0 00:23:40 You're welcome.
Speaker 2 00:23:43 I thought this through before brought up, I should've been like, this is SIM's list. She doesn't need to add new things to her list, but now, um, anyway. Okay. So let's go to number two. Okay. So tell me if this was a thing for you, but for me crow's feet.
Speaker 0 00:24:09 Um, yeah. So the only time I noticed crow's feet for me is when I smile. So I don't really notice it. Like when my eyes are just like at rest. So no, not yet. I think if they become permanent, like if they can become permanent, then I'll probably be upset. But like right now it's only, I only notice them when I smile. Oh,
Speaker 2 00:24:38 I feel like I have, like, I feel like they're there, but they are definitely they're in every picture.
Speaker 0 00:24:46 Oh, are they? That's crow's feet when they smile though,
Speaker 2 00:24:53 I feel like mine now, especially now they seem like smiley, but aged face, post,
Speaker 0 00:25:03 I think you just need to change your attitude towards what your pictures look like.
Speaker 2 00:25:08 Perhaps this is the youngest I shall ever be. Exactly. No you're right. But you know, it's actually funny because I know I said crow's feet, but this has been an ongoing issue for me since I was in my twenties.
Speaker 0 00:25:24 Oh,
Speaker 2 00:25:26 I don't know. It was like always one of those things where I'd be like, oh, I have crow's feet. Why do I have crow's feet? And it's because I smile a lot. So
Speaker 0 00:25:34 Yeah. That's the thing. So I think like I'm like everybody has crow's feet when they smile. It's just like a function of smiling with your eyes. I mean, you could have like a dead eyes smile in which case? Like that just looks ridiculous.
Speaker 2 00:25:48 Hilarious though. It looks so funny.
Speaker 0 00:25:53 I know. I'm like, yeah. I'm trying to think like do models sometimes smile without their eyes. I feel like they do sometimes anyway. Yeah. Yeah. I'm trying to think. I'm like, have I ever seen like pictures of models? Like smiling without their eyes?
Speaker 2 00:26:13 Oh wait. So, so what your eyes look at me used, but your face doesn't
Speaker 0 00:26:18 No. No. So your face looks amused, but your eyes don't.
Speaker 2 00:26:22 Oh, that's what you meant. Okay. Huh? I don't know how you'd be able to do that.
Speaker 0 00:26:28 Yeah. You'd need a lot of muscle control. I think for that. Anyway, I think it would look ridiculous. People would know they'd be like, that looks messed up.
Speaker 2 00:26:37 I have like a zoo Lander do his blue steel look, you know?
Speaker 0 00:26:49 I know. So if you want to do blue steel in all your pictures, I mean, yeah, that could work, but I'm like, otherwise everyone has crow's feet. I think that's just the way it is.
Speaker 2 00:26:58 I know. But it is one of those things where um, like when you're trying to do eye makeup and stuff, sometimes, you know, um, the eyeliner will bleed into the thing.
Speaker 0 00:27:09 Oh yeah. Yeah. See, I use pencil liners. So that's why I don't get that trouble. I don't get that problem.
Speaker 2 00:27:16 I will see, I use the liquid liner. And so sometimes like, you know, stretch it out, stretch it out.
Speaker 0 00:27:26 Yeah. I think that's why I get away with that. I don't think it, I don't. I think that's why it doesn't really affect me as much. Cause like I, yeah, I don't notice that at all.
Speaker 2 00:27:34 Hm. Okay. So you're aware that's not, you're not useless because you are, this is good because now I don't have one other thing to add to my list. So that's all right. Number three. Uh, what was my number three? If you like it for God, maybe I don't have one.
Speaker 0 00:28:01 Oh, we only have two things. That's good.
Speaker 2 00:28:03 No, I think, I feel like one, when we were driving back from deer Hurst, I feel like I had a giant list now. I don't so green. That's good. Free hair. Um, oh, I just found out. Yeah. And so I don't know if it's a thing yet, but I'm not. I'm I'm unsure if I should be worried about this or not, but um, thinning hair point. The women's a lot of women's hair thins as they get older.
Speaker 0 00:28:36 Yeah. Yeah. That can happen
Speaker 2 00:28:39 By that can happen. W elaborate please.
Speaker 0 00:28:45 Yeah. I mean, I think there is like a component of women who like either lose their hair thin or have like thin hair, I think like, as they approach menopause, basically. Um, I wonder if, actually that's why a lot of like older women tend to have shorter hair, but anyway, like yeah, it can happen. Um, but there's like work arounds. Now they have Rogaine for women. So, you know, and like, I think if you use like different products, you can like make your hair look fuller.
Speaker 2 00:29:13 That's a lot of work though. And now
Speaker 0 00:29:17 I know even resort to wigs. I know that find
Speaker 2 00:29:21 Out if you're one of those women,
Speaker 0 00:29:25 I don't know. Your hair starts thinning.
Speaker 2 00:29:28 We'll talk like a logical person.
Speaker 0 00:29:31 You've got really predicted. I don't think
Speaker 2 00:29:36 Because I'm like, now I'm a little bit nervous about this. Oh, and my number fourth, number four. I just thought of number four. Okay. But I had it because I feel like you and I talked about this maybe last year. Um, I can't remember when, but I feel like you told me it happens as you get older. And then I might've said again that I hate you. Yes. She's, you know, she gives me the scientific explanation for why something is happening to me and my body. You know, I was telling you, like, my arch feels flatter, like foot arch. Oh yeah. And I'm like, what the heck is happening? Like it, it feels weirdly flatter. Like it hurts sometimes. And I also don't tell this to people, but I actively now wear flats quite more often than I do my heels.
Speaker 0 00:30:41 Oh dude. I've like given up on heels for like months now.
Speaker 2 00:30:47 It's not like a shore fire sign of like aging.
Speaker 0 00:30:53 No, I think it's just like, no, I'm just trying to think of like, is it just because of years of being on heels where you're just like, I just want to be comfortable. And so like, maybe it's like a, don't give a fuck attitude when you get older. So maybe
Speaker 2 00:31:11 I don't give a fuck. Or is it that it hurts less if you don't wear heels?
Speaker 0 00:31:18 Well, it's always hurt less. If you don't wear heels. We all knew this heels
Speaker 2 00:31:22 For the hurt. Didn't matter. It didn't even register. I used to wear high heels. Um, but I lived in San Francisco and I would literally go up and down those Hills.
Speaker 0 00:31:33 Oh my God. That is dedication.
Speaker 2 00:31:36 And I didn't feel it. Like, it was like, you know, like, oh, what, we're going up to that restaurant or at the top of that hill. Yeah, sure. Let's just walk there at this only five minutes. Very like, and then it switched to carry extra pair of shoes, you know? And now I didn't, I went on a date the other day and I didn't even bother, I just wore my running shoes. Really. I was thinking like, oh, you know what, in case, cause we were just supposed to do something outdoorsy. So I was like, you know, and then, but then I was like, well, in case we want to grab some dinner or something, you know, or you know, drinks after I should take my shoes with me, high heels. Right. Like switch out. And then I thought, who cares to do it? And at the time I thought, wow, Sam, you're so confident. Right. But now after this weekend though, I feel like it was just a function of the fact that I'm older now.
Speaker 0 00:32:41 Oh my God. That's hilarious. I mean, it could be a bit of both. Like maybe, I don't know. Maybe when you're in your twenties, you're just like, I need, I need the heels in order to like fit some like some view of society's like version of what a pretty person should be. I dunno.
Speaker 2 00:32:58 Maybe, maybe,
Speaker 0 00:32:59 And now you're just like, I don't care if I don't fit that version, this guy better like me, like regardless. Cause he's going to be seeing me in running shoes for most of the time. You better get used to it now.
Speaker 2 00:33:10 And before I used to have one pair of flats, now I have three.
Speaker 0 00:33:15 Yeah, exactly. It's like, if you can't handle me and flats, you don't deserve me.
Speaker 2 00:33:22 Yeah. That story. Cause it just sounds so much nicer. Not delve into the real story there, but the hurt, the hurt, the falling arch thing.
Speaker 0 00:33:36 Yeah. I was thinking about this the other day. Cause like I think, um, yeah, cause I was uh, like I had just been to a wedding and I was like putting away heal. Okay. So I'd lie. I did wear heels. So then, um, uh, but I was putting away my heels and I was like, and I saw like an older pair of my shoes and I was just like, why don't I have those shoes as much anymore? And then I was thinking, oh, you know what? I think it's because they don't fit me as well. And I honestly think it's because as I've grown older, my feet have now like changed in shape and I'm sure I, and I'm sure I have a feeling. It is. I think I did remember reading something about that. It's that like, you know, like your bones and ligaments kind of like realign is your kind of aging and that obviously like years and years of gravity on your body, like does have an effect. And so yeah, I have a feeling. That's what it is anyway. Sorry. Now I'm getting depressed. I'm like, damn it.
Speaker 2 00:34:36 You are right. Um, Chicago, university of Chicago medicine.org. Okay. They don't change in size necessarily, but feet me get wider as we age the change in their last. That is the last city, the same way. Other body parts. Do tissues become less tight causing increased with and sagging of the arches. Oh my God.
Speaker 0 00:35:04 Yeah. I was thinking about that yesterday because I was just like, oh, I I'm pretty sure that a lot of my shoes don't fit anymore because my feet are getting later because I'm getting,
Speaker 2 00:35:14 This is upsetting. Why has no one ever told me this before? Shouldn't this be a thing? Shouldn't they be marketing shoes like that? That, Hey, listen, first sign of aging. Why is no one solving for this?
Speaker 0 00:35:28 Haven't
Speaker 2 00:35:28 They though?
Speaker 0 00:35:30 I'm like, isn't that the whole shtick for Naturalizer
Speaker 2 00:35:34 What is Naturalizer oh
Speaker 0 00:35:36 Dear. How you okay.
Speaker 2 00:35:39 Uh, I'm Mike Naturalizer I feel are for like, but it's a what? Like a arch support thing.
Speaker 0 00:35:49 Yeah. Like I feel like they sell shoes for comfort and they're often like for older people.
Speaker 2 00:35:57 Oh, well you mean the shoe store? Yeah. Oh, sorry. I was thinking of like gadgets and gizmos.
Speaker 0 00:36:06 Oh no, no, no, no, no. I'm pretty sure. I'm like, I'm pretty sure that's naturalized his whole reason for existing,
Speaker 2 00:36:16 I guess. Wow. Things that you're sort of blind to, if you don't need them a oh
Speaker 0 00:36:26 Well, yeah, yeah. Yeah. See. And that, the, the reason that like, I guess the reason I've known about it for so long is because I've always had wide feet. Like I have very wide feet for the sun for like their length. Like it's just, it's just, it's just my genetics. And um, yeah. So like when, when I was younger I'd always have to go and look for like, like shoes that were for like wider feet and like, yeah. And Naturalizer was one of those stores, but then what annoyed me about Naturalizer um, was that they just didn't sell fashion forward shoes. And so, and I was just like, oh, like, why can't you just sell nicer shoes? But then like I, uh, yeah, I, I found a work around like, there's some, like, there's just some, I just used to just buy my shoes a bit wider than I need to, which is probably not the best idea. But anyway, this is what you have to do.
Speaker 2 00:37:20 Fair fair. Um, wow. Okay. So I did not know this was a thing, so apparently it is. And now, now I know. Um, but yeah, so I think those would be my top. Those would be the ones that I can think of right now, even though I swear to God as we were driving home, um, I feel like I had a million in my phone.
Speaker 0 00:37:47 Oh, you were worried about shrinking too. I remember you told me that once. Oh yes.
Speaker 2 00:37:52 That's okay. I can't afford to shrink shit. I can't afford to shrink
Speaker 0 00:37:58 And we'll then take yeah. So the big thing is yeah, just calcium and vitamin D dude make sure
Speaker 2 00:38:04 The real thing, right? Like that is a real thing.
Speaker 0 00:38:07 Yeah. Because most people shrink because of, yeah, let me, most people shrink, like, okay. So they shrink in two ways. Like you can shrink because as you get older, like your muscle mass reduces, um, so then obviously like, um, weights are probably the best way of like maintaining muscle mass. And then, um, then you shrink because of osteoporosis, right? Because of what you ended up hap like what ends up happening is like your bone density lowers. And sometimes people get like mini fractures, their spine, like theirs, their spine basically like collapses under, under like your weight. And so, uh, yeah. Calcium and vitamin D.
Speaker 2 00:38:46 Oh geez. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. But, but that is a real fear though. Um, cause you know, I'm five feet on a very good day after I've done my stretches. Um, which is a roundabout way of saying that I'm actually not five feet fully <inaudible> I will never, ever, ever say that out loud, but the truth is I am five feet and we do not want to go lower than five feet because it's tough enough being five feet and not being able to reach anything in life.
Speaker 0 00:39:29 Yeah. That's why I always enlist the help of other people. Can you get that for me? Thanks.
Speaker 2 00:39:37 By the way, this is why I was interpreting my wearing of my running shoes on the date. Like, you know, cause I'm like, wow, I am so confident because even like, even I think right before the pandemic, even if it had been an outdoorsy date, I would have figured out a way to wear heels, heels. Like I would have worn like, you know, my, um, the boots with the higher heels or something to get a little bit of, um, leverage, um, you know, and I didn't
Speaker 0 00:40:11 So that growth though, I feel like personal growth, I would think so.
Speaker 2 00:40:15 Yeah. Well I would have liked physical growth over personal growth, but Growth. It's like,
Speaker 0 00:40:30 Oh, although actually that's not totally true. So like there are some people who are like, and this is extreme. And I'm like, are we at this point where height is really that important anyway. But like there are some people who like, um, go to orthopedic surgeons and they like, they actually, the surgery involves breaking a bone and then yeah. And then actually like link like yeah, like artificially lengthening it and then like allowing bone to grow around, like the break so that you like gain a few inches. This is what people do.
Speaker 2 00:41:09 No,
Speaker 0 00:41:10 No I'm, I'm not, no, I'm not lying. This is like, this is what modern medicine is like.
Speaker 2 00:41:15 Okay. No, I think, I think I'm going to go the route of, uh, leaning into my cuteness is so tiny. It's like, yes. You know, I am so adorable. I get that a lot.
Speaker 0 00:41:35 That's so funny. So then did the guy care?
Speaker 2 00:41:39 Yeah. No, it was really funny cause it was like w but it was just so funny. Cause you know, I was just thinking like, wow, like that is, you know, I was just more impressed with myself than I think anyone else was, You know, it was growth. And I think I perhaps was the only person who knew how much growth went into that.
Speaker 0 00:42:05 That's hilarious.
Speaker 2 00:42:07 But no, he didn't care. He seemed all right.
Speaker 0 00:42:11 That's too funny. Oh no, that's good. That's good. That's a good sign. He doesn't, he doesn't care about like what shoes you were wearing. Oh, I don't know. Does any, any guy really care? I don't know. Yeah. Although I've noticed, I've noticed that players like true players will notice a girl shoes. Really? Yeah. Every time I've met a guy and like he's mentioned my shoes, I'm like, just like, you know, a little bit more about him. You're like, oh
Speaker 2 00:42:42 Yeah,
Speaker 0 00:42:43 Yeah. I'm like, huh. Yeah. You really do know how to like manipulate a girl's weaknesses here.
Speaker 2 00:42:52 Yeah. Actually that is true. And nail Polish guys who notice a girl's nails.
Speaker 0 00:42:59 Oh yeah. Yeah. I think anyone ever noticed my nail Polish, but I, I, it, it goes in the same category shoe.
Speaker 2 00:43:04 Oh. In the same category. Yeah. I actually, yeah. I just, yeah,
Speaker 0 00:43:09 Yeah, yeah. Yeah. Guys are noticing like the small details that like other guys never mentioned, I'm like, you're a player.
Speaker 2 00:43:21 It could just be that they weren't her, you know that they noticed it on you and you dismissed them because you're like, no, you're a player I'm gonna move on from this month.
Speaker 0 00:43:36 I know. I know. It's like my like small little anecdotal sample basically.
Speaker 2 00:43:43 And it actually could have been like, uh, they were like implementing like some lesson they learned from their, I dunno, friends or something. It's like, you know, if you really like her, make sure you notice everything about her and tell her that first time they actually say, wow, those are lovely shoes. And you're like, right. We're done
Speaker 0 00:44:13 Lives that could have lived.
Speaker 2 00:44:18 It only matters if you accidentally like, you know, said no to like, I dunno who would be like someone you would have regretted saying no to.
Speaker 0 00:44:32 And you know, I'm trying to think of like, I don't know anybody. I've never met anybody that famous who noticed my like purse slash shoes, whatever.
Speaker 2 00:44:46 But yeah, no, this was like one of those things where I'm like, there are these physical signs of getting older though. Right? I mean, I mean, jokes aside, it's, it's funny that, you know, some of those things, they, even, whether it's for a split second, I feel like I do did or do worry about them. Like the, the falling arch thing. Like I actually didn't know that it was a thing. And so I was trying to figure out, I'm like, oh my gosh, it actually hurts. Like, I don't understand why my foot feels flatter. I should have, but I think that I just came and asked you, instead of Telling me,
Speaker 0 00:45:24 I'm like, yeah, that's older.
Speaker 2 00:45:27 I was like, oh, that sucks. But, um, but yeah, I mean, I'm sure there are other things that, you know, um, over time we'll start noticing and be like, oh, this is, but now I'm going to keep an eye out to the reading thing. Like, do I actually move the menu a little bit further away from me when I'm reading?
Speaker 0 00:45:45 Yeah. Yeah. I I'm, I'm starting, I I'm, I'm, I'm noticing that I'm doing that. I'm doing, I've been doing that recently. Like it's not so bad. Like I can still see the fine print, but yeah. And like it's so I can't remember who was telling me this, but like, there's like someone who's older than me. And they were like, oh, I'm, I'm so happy that QR these, you know, with the pandemic, like the QR code menus are a thing now, because with, I think their presbyopia they're finding that it's just easier to deal with because then you can put it on your phone and you can just like expand the lettering. And I was just saying like, yeah, like that is actually really good. I'm like, why do we even bother with paper menus anymore? So yeah. I'm like, I guess that's something I should probably be looking forward to soon, but yeah,
Speaker 2 00:46:41 It'd be almost smaller on your phone, the menu. Oh, by I guess you can enlarge the size
Speaker 0 00:46:47 And texts and zoom in.
Speaker 2 00:46:49 Yeah, yeah. No, that makes sense.
Speaker 0 00:46:52 Yeah. Mean, yeah. You can basically just expand and then just like, you know, I mean like probably say yeah, yeah, yeah. So anyway, I know I'm trying to think of something that's bothered me.
Speaker 2 00:47:04 I was going to,
Speaker 0 00:47:05 Like, I know I'm thinking, I'm thinking, well, the one thing that I don't like, I don't know if it's something I'm, I think I'm still coming to grips with it. I'm not totally sure if it's a thing or not, because I mean, I know that like under eye circles or like bags under the eyes are a thing, but like, I'm like, do they exist on me or not? I'm still coming to grips with whether or not that's a thing for me. Cause I'm aging
Speaker 2 00:47:29 Thing though, because I've always had dark circles under my eyes.
Speaker 0 00:47:34 Yeah. It's not necessarily an aging thing. And so yeah. Like I think like some people are just like genetically
Speaker 2 00:47:40 There's fashion trend now.
Speaker 0 00:47:43 Yeah, it is. That's true. Maybe I should just embrace it anyway. Yeah, I know. Well, the thing is, is like, I can't tell if there are things for me. Cause like sometimes if I haven't slept very much, then I'll notice that there's like some weird, like folded like skin under my eyes. But then like if I've slept really well, sometimes it's gone. Like other times I don't notice it. So I'm just like, is this a constant thing or is it just like a factor of the fact that I just don't have any sleep anyway. So
Speaker 2 00:48:16 Given all nighters you tend to pull.
Speaker 0 00:48:22 Exactly. So I'm like, yeah. So maybe that's what it is. So yeah. So like, I don't know. Yeah. So I don't know if I can use that, use that as like a, one of my aging phenomenon,
Speaker 2 00:48:32 You know what we should talk about next time or another time I just realized because I'm like, oh no, no, that one will actually, um, probably like take hours, personality changes. As we've gotten older as a function of age,
Speaker 0 00:48:49 We can do that.
Speaker 2 00:48:51 Like grouchier and then that's just, you know, the most common one, but locals that have changed, you know, or how you perceive things.
Speaker 0 00:49:04 Yeah. No, I mean, yeah, let's do it. Yeah. We can do that. And it can do that. I feel like
Speaker 2 00:49:09 Seriously, you actually have no other physical signs of aging that bothered you.
Speaker 0 00:49:15 Not yet. Not yet. Or maybe like, maybe like bleedingly and then I just forget about them anyway. Yeah. It might get worse as I get older, maybe I'll start remembering them and be like, Hmm, this is like a constant thing now. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 2 00:49:33 Well, I will be one of those people then, um, who who've like attained what's the right word, send them right. Like very calm, collected. Like I am okay with this, you know, this is perfect the way it is.
Speaker 0 00:49:53 Yeah. Well, I mean, don't get me wrong. I don't think I've quite reached that state of denim. But the one thing that I have come to understand is that this is the best you're going to look. It's pretty much going to get worse from here. So just be happy with it for now.
Speaker 2 00:50:07 Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 0 00:50:11 Yeah. I mean, unless you're going to pull, like, unless you're going to pull like a celebrity make-over and just like, you know, just like redo your face, like with plastic surgery, but I don't know,
Speaker 2 00:50:20 Going back to that then, um, latest pictures of J-Lo with Ben Affleck and whatever that came out this weekend.
Speaker 0 00:50:28 She, she looked hot
Speaker 2 00:50:32 To say like perfection.
Speaker 0 00:50:34 Yeah. Yeah. I know. I think like on Insta somebody had put her side-by-side with like Rue McClanahan from like golden girls when they were like around the same age. I think like Rue McClanahan was like 53 and I think JLo's 52. It's just like, yeah. I think our idea of what, oh, actually, yeah. I'm wondering if we should talk about this on another pod, but like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But like I'm convinced, so, okay. So part of the thing is, is that I think what we think of as what an older person should look like has changed over time, which is like, I, I wonder it's like partly good and partly bad in the sense that like, like on the one hand I think like, yes, we are recognizing that a 50 year old doesn't mean like your life is over and you cannot look good anymore.
Speaker 0 00:51:28 Like you're like relegated to like a lifetime of moomoos and like, you know, like closeting yourself in like your home with like, no one, like basically you're you, you should be a shut-in and just where mum was around the house all the time. Nobody thinks that. Or like you would think like fewer people think that. Right. And then, um, and then, uh, but the, but then on the other hand, like I wonder if it's like on the flip side, if it just means that people have like another level of beauty that they need to aspire to,
Speaker 2 00:52:02 Because fire to that is a question we probably should actually save that for a different
Speaker 0 00:52:09 Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
Speaker 2 00:52:12 Wow. We actually have two topics we're going to talk about in the future listeners.
Speaker 0 00:52:17 You heard it here first,
Speaker 2 00:52:19 First. I love it. When that happens, when we actually have topics decided on before we even need to think about them
Speaker 0 00:52:32 Too funny, we just need to talk it through. That's all.
Speaker 2 00:52:35 Um, so on that note though, um, I think, you know, we should probably call this an episode today. Um, um, our listeners share with us, um, you know, what, uh, signs of aging you first noticed about yourself and you know, how did you react to them? Um, you know, if you're like Shiv, uh, let us know in the comments, if you're not like Shiv and more like SIM, uh, definitely let us know in the comments.
Speaker 0 00:53:05 I know
Speaker 2 00:53:07 Let's be friends. Does this make me look old at, you know, um, dot com that's where you can email us or all social handles are, does this make me look old and um, yeah, we'll see you next
Speaker 0 00:53:22 Sounds good. Bye
