Speaker 0 00:00:00 <inaudible> hi and welcome to does this make me look old, a podcast about aging as gracefully as possible when you're just not ready for two 40 something year old friends will find themselves kind of straddling that really odd period of time when aging and everything that is associated with is starting to become a much bigger part of our lives. We're definitely curious, but at the same time, rather terrified about aging. I'm Schiff. I'm a health science nerd and pop culture themes, and I'm SIM and adult and weighting obsessed with finance and self-help books. We're going to be talking about the stereotypes of aging and how they affect us. And we'll also be doing some deeper dives into some interesting topics, such as what it's like to get old in the society dating when you're older and scientific advancements in anti-aging products and even evolution and scientific thinking around aging and throughout it all we chat rant laugh about or adulting mishaps of which there are so, so, so many. So join us as we navigate our second quarter life crisis.
Speaker 0 00:01:09 Hi, welcome back to we're serious episodes. Yes. We'll try to liven it up a little bit, but yeah, we're going to be talking about like some, I think it's a kind of a as no. Yeah, no, no, you're right. It is, it is a very serious topic. Um, it's basically, um, fears about aging. Yes. And how they change as we get older. Yes. So, or even like just fears when you were younger and how your fears change as you, as you get older. Yeah. So not necessarily around aging, but like just life in general. Yeah. So, yeah. So although it's a little bit, I guess it's a little bit, it can be a bit dark. We actually put this question to a number of our friends, um, just to get an idea of like what kind of fears they had around aging or how their fears changed as they got older. And, um, we got a lot of interesting responses and I think that part of the reason we wanted to talk about it is that just to get around the idea that we're not all alone in this, but all of us have these fears and a lot of us are sharing the same fears and I'm going to be all touchy, feely, but we're all in this together.
Speaker 0 00:02:30 It's so funny. And so I'll start off with this. I'm kind of afraid now that I didn't actually view those fears, what that says about me. How did you view them? I don't know. I just thought it was cute. Oh, all those conversations that we're having with all our different groups and they were just so funny. <inaudible>
Speaker 1 00:03:03 Yeah. Now, now I'm worried that I didn't take this seriously. It's a serious topic. It is when you said it that way, I was like, Oh, she's actually right. Well, touchy, feely. I think it's just so against my nature. My nature. Why be touchy feely about it? If you can laugh it up,
Speaker 0 00:03:30 I mean, see, but that's why it's good to have you here because I'll be all touchy, feely, and then you can laugh it off and then it'll all be balanced.
Speaker 1 00:03:40 Yeah. No, absolutely. I'll do my best. I'll do
Speaker 0 00:03:44 My best. Do you want to start it off?
Speaker 1 00:03:46 Well, it's, it's the first one that you said about like, feeling that we're not alone in this. And I remember, um, actually that, that was a very common one. It was that fear of dying alone, fear of being alone. Um, when you're old, um, around that the theme of loneliness and being alone, not that they're the same thing, but, um, the fear of both of those concepts was a fairly common one across the different groups we talked to.
Speaker 0 00:04:18 It was, yeah. And I mean, legitimate fear, right? Like people get older and, you know, depending on, depending on lock, like you might outlive your siblings, you might outlive your friends. And it's really scary. Like I would find that very scary
Speaker 1 00:04:34 Freak me out. I won't lie. Like, you know, my sister and I are 10 years apart. And I feel like if something would have happened to her before it happened to me, I would probably just, yeah, wow. I am deep and soft and sweet <inaudible>, but it is actually a very legitimate fear to live. Especially people who mean the most to you. Exactly. And that, that is you should have been.
Speaker 0 00:05:07 Yeah. Um, yeah, I mean, but then it's, it's kind of nice to know that, you know, other people are feeling the same thing,
Speaker 1 00:05:16 Sorry, I'm just going to, I have to read out one of them though, because it is about the lead dying alone and living alone or being alone, but it was the way one of our friends put it, um, where it's not funny at all. And the reason I'm laughing is because it's not funny that I'm so scared of this for my own self that I think I need to laugh it out. Um, but it's basically says I'm so afraid of dying alone or dying. And having people find my dead body days later. And I think like every time I watch, you know, I'm into like shows like law and order and stuff like that. And every time I see like those old people and, and, you know, something happens to them and you know, if that episode has them dying in their apartment and especially if it's not peacefully in their sleep.
Speaker 0 00:06:04 So most of the <inaudible>
Speaker 1 00:06:13 One of my deepest fears. It's so I think that's why I'm laughing about the drive though. It's a very paint left though.
Speaker 0 00:06:22 No, it's one of those, like I have to laugh nervously because it scares me so much.
Speaker 1 00:06:28 It really does. It, it stresses me out. And along with that, there was, you know, the other things that come with that, right. It's like when you're older and what if physically you're weak and then you can't move and then you're trying to get out of bed and then you just trip and fall and then hit your head. Yeah. Like it's like those scenarios that sometimes just keep me home.
Speaker 0 00:06:53 I know. Yeah, no, I get that. And I mean, that, that was also a very common theme among a lot of our friends was just like being afraid of like losing physical function. So like sight hearing, being able to walk properly, that type of thing. So of course, even like meeting other people's health in order to toilet oneself and things like that, like that is my nightmare.
Speaker 1 00:07:13 Oh my God. That is, yeah. Oh, that is heartbreaking.
Speaker 0 00:07:17 It's just like, yeah. Cause like once you start losing the physical function to be able to do that for yourself, like then having to rely on somebody else. I mean, at the end of the day, it, it can happen to a lot of us and like, we shouldn't really be embarrassed about it, but
Speaker 1 00:07:36 That's, I think that's what embarrasses them. Right. Because people are like, you know, that they don't want to fall down in front of others or they don't want someone else. They don't want to rely on someone else, um, to go to the bathroom, for example. Right. So yeah. No, I totally get that. That is actually
Speaker 0 00:07:54 <inaudible>. Yeah, I know. I mean, you know, a lot of this stuff like doesn't necessarily happen. Like it doesn't have to happen when you're older. Like it can happen kind of at any time. Really. That's true. You could have a major illness, like tomorrow I could have a major illness and then somebody would have to help me kind of like take a shower or like beat myself or something.
Speaker 1 00:08:19 Yeah. One of the comments I remember basically said that the reason they feel like they're afraid of getting older and loneliness is because people aren't nice to old people.
Speaker 0 00:08:32 That's what they said. And I hope that's not true.
Speaker 1 00:08:36 Yeah. Um, I really hope that's not true. Although all the COVID stories about the old age ones, um, okay. That's a different topic for a different day. Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:08:45 Which I do want to touch on because it just, it goes, okay. Yeah. It goes into that fear. Yeah, exactly. And I think that's my, with it is that, like, it just goes with it, it goes to how we view a segment of society. Right. Like how we view, um, the elderly in a long-term care home and, and how much help they need and how, how, like we, as a society have just decided that maybe they aren't worthy of our attention or worthy of our help. Right. I mean, yeah. Anyway, we'll have to go into that in a light, in a more lengthy topic, but yeah. Like I understand why that is a fear because in some ways it's true old people are not treated well, even though, you know, in your individual family, they might be, but then like as a whole in society society, they're not, yeah, this is true.
Speaker 1 00:09:38 But world, please prove us wrong of our stereotypes. Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:09:44 Yeah. No, I agree. I feel like, I think that's the other reason that I kind of wanted to have this kind of out there is just like, yes, we can all share in our collective fears. But then like, I would like to hear, I mean, I would like to hear from our listeners as to like advocacy for older people and you know, like things around that, like how can we, how can we make things better for the elderly and really ourselves, like in 20 to 30 years, you know, when, uh, the ground work now exactly. In order to, in order to make the world a better place for the elderly right jokes,
Speaker 1 00:10:19 There are a lot of people who do care and who do do nice things. Like, I don't know if you remember, um, around Christmas time, one of the old age homes got
Speaker 0 00:10:29 And then doing that for Valentine's day. Oh my God. Yeah.
Speaker 1 00:10:33 That is sweet. Yes, it is.
Speaker 0 00:10:36 Oh, so basically for our listeners who don't know. Um, yeah, so for Christmas, like, you know, just given the fact that like COVID is really like disproportionately affected longterm care homes, there was this, um, kind of movement to help make, you know, seniors at these, um, long-term care homes who may not necessarily have family that comes and visits them all the time to, you know, feel a little bit more, I guess they feel a little bit more loved, you know, by the community. And so a number of people took an initiative to actually like send like letters and like messages of care to every single person. And then in like one of these long-term care homes and a multiple, multiple long-term care homes. So I know I read that story and it was just so sweet and just so heartwarming. Yeah, for sure. For sure.
Speaker 1 00:11:24 I, I really liked that. And I'm so glad to hear that they're going to do the same thing for family.
Speaker 0 00:11:29 Do the same thing for Valentine's day. I read that the other day. Yeah. So I know, I think so. Yes. Um, yeah, there's a movement, so you can send somebody in a long-term care home of Valentine.
Speaker 1 00:11:42 And so, um, there is, um, the other one, which was also very, very common, um, among our friends and that was fear of our passing away.
Speaker 0 00:11:56 I know. Yeah. And that was not a fear when I was in my truck.
Speaker 1 00:11:59 Oh no, no. And it's, it's become more real. I think the first time I realized that like recently that doesn't say much about me actually. Um, you know, I feel like my sister is a lot better about these things than I am, but, um, it finally dawned on me that my dad's gotten so much older, really. Like I was like, cause like, yeah, I always feel my dad is like very young and vibrant, which, you know, I mean, he's so jolly. And so like, you know, a foot in mouth, like jokes piss my mother off, you know, um, very much that man. And I love him, but it's just, it never occurred to me. Cause he was always the one who would like, you know, get stuff done. Like he was always so active. He always is so active. Um, but now I realize that his activeness is slowing down, slowing down it's and sometimes he looks frail, you know, like, like just his arms or his skin, you know, like his legs, like, I don't know, like he'll sit there sometimes. I'm like, Oh yeah, like a older man. That was kind of, you know,
Speaker 0 00:13:14 I know, I know that that point when you realized that your parents are getting old, it's like, I'm very, I don't know. I don't want to say earth shattering, but it's kind of earth shattering because like, you know, like they're your parents and they're supposed to be kind of your rock and then suddenly you realize they're not so rock like anymore, you know? Like it's just, it is a bit, it's a bit disconcerting.
Speaker 1 00:13:35 Yeah. And it's something it starts changing. Right? Like you find yourself being more of a, like a caretaker almost, right? Like now I'm like, no, dad don't touch that. I'll pick it up and I'll take it, you know, don't move it. Like I'll do the heavy lifting, you know, whereas before I would never do the heavy lift now, like before I'd be like, Oh dad, thank you for moving this couch or whatever. Whereas now I'd be like, dad, don't touch that. I will get someone to do this someone else. That's why I was like, I better correct this before. Like my family calls in and messages lets you know, that that was a total lie. And this podcast is making you more honest.
Speaker 0 00:14:30 That was a very common theme among a lot of our friends. So I mean, I I've thought about it like a lot as well and you just can't help it because you know, as like, cause as you're getting older, your parents are getting much older, so yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 1 00:14:48 I'm going to move to a different topic, different fear and this. Okay. So this is kind of, you know, more about us again. Cause I mean, not just us as him, but like our most yeah. Um, I mean people who are worried about retirement and whether it's, um, having running out of money. Oh my God. Yeah. Or it's um, you know, not being able to have the kind of fun that they want to have once, you know, because it would be too late by that. So yeah. Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:15:18 Oh my goodness. Well, first of all, to our friend who thinks that they cannot have fun when they're older, I would just like to say, I don't think that's true, especially because
Speaker 1 00:15:27 Friend we'll call her L she is hilarious. She's just so full of joy. Like she's just,
Speaker 0 00:15:34 <inaudible> call her, we'll call her Kiki <inaudible>. Um, but yeah, she's just so much fun. Yeah.
Speaker 1 00:15:46 I cannot, even if she weren't a hundred, I'd imagine her as one of those like full of life kind of people, for sure. For sure. Right? Yeah. So that's what, but this is really funny because I just I'll have to read this out because it is also to do with retirement. And this other friend was like, whenever I meet with my financial advisor and they talk about my RRSP, I always ask
Speaker 0 00:16:10 What happens if I die before getting <inaudible>
Speaker 1 00:16:15 Fear is not just about getting old, but it's also about not getting old.
Speaker 0 00:16:23 <inaudible> that's actually legit. There's a legitimate fear. I actually have thought that on occasion. Yeah. Because I'm just like, I'm spending all of this money on an RSP. What if I die when I'm like 15 <inaudible> does it go to your family? Well, okay. Yes. And here's where I'm going to give everyone a PSA, right? Oh, well actually this should be a PSE for myself as well because I have not written down and it's like on my list of things to do, but like, yeah,
Speaker 1 00:17:05 That freaks me out really to write a will to like every time, like I remember when I was in my twenties and my dad wanted to write his will and he would want to explain it to me because I'm the older child. So I needed to know I ran away from that conversation. So the truth is I still haven't had that conversation.
Speaker 0 00:17:28 <inaudible>
Speaker 1 00:17:31 Can't bring myself to think about it. Yeah,
Speaker 0 00:17:34 For sure. No, I understand that. It's like,
Speaker 1 00:17:37 If I don't think about it, it will be public, right? Like a golden retriever. It's like, you just pretend like if you sort of, you know, if you pretend it's not happening, it's not happening. Not happening.
Speaker 0 00:17:47 Yeah. For sure. No, I get that. I totally do get bad. I don't know. I think that is what prevents a lot of people from writing wills is because they think that if like in the act of writing, it they're basically jinxing themselves to like die right away. Yeah. Failure.
Speaker 1 00:18:05 That's exactly it. I'm like, why am I thinking I'm talking about this. I don't want to, will it
Speaker 0 00:18:10 Yeah. Into existence, right? Yeah. No, no. What the basic premise of the secret is, is the premise of the secret. But I don't think that that should <inaudible>
Speaker 1 00:18:24 But uh, yeah, no, that's definitely one of the skills. Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:18:28 The reason I'm saying this is because like, yeah, like, so I was given a talking to by my financial advisor because she was like, you do realize that if you don't write a will, but it all goes into, like, it basically goes into the government's pocket and then they figure out where to disperse it. So yeah. Yeah. Don't quote me. Cause I am not like probate lawyer or yeah, actually this is a good moment to tell you a lot of the times things
Speaker 1 00:18:53 Talk about it might need a little bit more recent.
Speaker 0 00:18:58 This is just our opinion.
Speaker 1 00:18:59 Usually based on what we know or think or feel
Speaker 0 00:19:03 I have read. Yeah. It's just, yeah. And it's just regurgitation. Not necessarily be your truth or your reality. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Or even though we may have read it, we may not have regurgitated it properly. In other words. Yes. We're not experts. But anyway, so what I wanted to say about the will thing is that, um, yeah, sometimes it might go into probate and then like you actually, like there's legal, there's legal processes that you have to go into in order to get the money kind of to the right people. And so, and so
Speaker 1 00:19:39 Cause RSP that's one worry. What if you have a lot of debt?
Speaker 0 00:19:45 No. So then I think what happens is it goes to the government, they pay off your debts first and then they like figure out what to <inaudible>. Maybe I don't need to pay them off.
Speaker 1 00:20:01 You pay your debts off. That is not, my dad would die. He thinks that I do not pay no, no. Always pay your debts off and do not let interest accrue I'm Brown. So that is lesson number one, do not pay interest. If you can help it always pay your bills on time. Okay.
Speaker 0 00:20:20 I was just like, but don't you want the interest to accrue on things that are like, you know, like investments?
Speaker 1 00:20:26 No, no, no. That's different. But the debts, like my dad always was like, do not spend more than you can because otherwise if you're, if you're paying interest till the next month you're in trouble.
Speaker 0 00:20:37 Oh that's that's good advice. Yeah. Difficult to do, but it's good advice.
Speaker 1 00:20:44 I'm trying very hard to live by that now.
Speaker 0 00:20:50 So you're doing right by your father. That's good.
Speaker 1 00:20:53 Only in 2021, by the way. I finally paid my line of credit. Yeah. Yeah. So that's nice. Yeah. Anyway.
Speaker 0 00:21:06 Okay. So, Oh yeah. Where are we? Oh yeah, we're talking about, we're talking about retirement and finances, but that's, it's really funny that, that your friend said that about, about not being able to enjoy the benefits of your RSPs or I guess for our, I guess for our American listeners, your 401k is, or yeah. I always have to, I always have to put that caveat because we're Canadian, not everybody is RSPs. Okay.
Speaker 1 00:21:31 That's true. Yeah. Wait, isn't ours also called 401k.
Speaker 0 00:21:35 No. Oh no. It's just, yeah. I think it's just that the U S that has 401k
Speaker 1 00:21:40 Well you're right. Yeah. Okay. Um, I don't know. No, I do know. Um, but yeah, no. Okay. So retirement, I actually, that actually brings me to the next one, which, um, the fee and I, and we're kind of in case you haven't realized going by themes because a lot of them, you know, we're so similar, like people are responding, but this is about basically the no regrets thing. And you know, it's a jumping off of like, you know, um, having fun, having, being able to have fun when you're older, but also not having regrets along the way. Um, sort of living life to the fullest and there were many different versions of it. Um, I'm trying to remember, um, like I think one of your
Speaker 0 00:22:25 Friends have like a really, Oh my God, she was poetic. I wish I could speak like this.
Speaker 1 00:22:33 It was so it was just worded so nicely. It was, Oh, you're here, here it is. Um, okay. And by the way, this friend is probably one of the most gracefully aging friends. I have, like, she loves getting older and she loves the wisdom that it brings. Like she feels much more settled. Um, but, um, she did something
Speaker 0 00:22:52 She's basically not kicking and screaming into her forties, like certain things
Speaker 1 00:22:56 She is in her forties. And she's wonderful about it. Just so complacent. It's a joy to watch her. And, um, w what did she say? Oh, here it is. It's, um, maybe the fear that with time as we go from one chapter to another, um, just want to make sure that did I do the most before I move on before I can get back to it again. And then, um, uh, you know, below later, I'm trying to read through the lines here and without my glasses, um, in a sense lost wisdom gained itself is actually a fear of consequences. The constant fear of being on a one directional conveyor belt and regrets and imagined. And I dunno, that was very poetic.
Speaker 0 00:23:40 It just nicely and succinctly describes like issues around legacy. Right. Like, I think that, like, I mean, especially that first comment that she made, like as to whether or not she did the most before she moved on. Like, I think that it's something that I've been thinking about a lot. It's just like, what are you leaving as your legacy as you, you know, as you age or like, or what, what will your legacy be after you've passed on? So that that's, um, I'm sure we all think about it in different ways, but yeah.
Speaker 1 00:24:12 Um, so this year, you know, that it's been rough at work, like just for me, like in terms of like my projects and different things. So I'm very, very tired and very, you know, and, and, um, but it's funny because I think typically my version of that was I would, like, I would have such a fear of missing out FOMO that I would try and schedule before pandemic. Like I needed to have something every single day and I needed to do commit to, like, if there were two events, I would go for the two events, um, you know, like sort of, I was never one of those people that's like, no, no, let me pace things out. It's like, no, let me do as much as possible and, and get things done. Yeah. But my thing was, I would say like, I'll sleep when I'm dead, because people would like, you know, and, and that was like my way of sort of, I guess, trying to live life to the fullest except now. And I don't know if it's a function of getting older, I just don't seem to have the energy and I physically am tired. Um, which is very frustrating, but like, I'm like, you know, after putting in a full day of work and now independently keep in mind that we're not going out, we're not doing 10 million things. And get, I feel like I'm more tired now than I was even a year and a half ago. Yeah.
Speaker 0 00:25:27 Yeah. Yeah. I mean, some of that I'm sure is possibly because of like the whole work from home situation, because you're not really getting a break. Right. Like it was just like your work life is kind of bleeding into your personal life in a sense. Right. So, I mean, like, I would find like personally, I would find that exhausting. Like if you can't have that divide, right, you have a separation between like, this is my work. This is my work time. And this is my like, downtime. Right. Then I think that's also part of it. It's really hard to tell how much of it is really because of your aging and how much of it is just paying us a pandemic life.
Speaker 1 00:26:03 You know what it is not about me getting older. We will go with that. It is all about the pandemic that has ruined my life and sucked my energy. It's a tough time for everybody. And so, uh, but you're right, but I will take the pandemic <inaudible> but that's actually a good segue because work, there were a number of comments around,
Speaker 0 00:26:33 Around work. Yeah, no, that's true. Specifically around ageism at work. Yeah. And this is also, this also goes to around like, fears that change as you age, but like how, and almost like how more, how more things change. The more they stay the same, because like, one of our friends mentioned, you know, the age, some is an issue at work and that in your twenties, you're kind of discounted because you don't have the experience, but then, you know, once you get older, it kind of flips back on you and then you're discounted because now they think you're out of it and you don't really, you, you don't have your pulse on things anymore. Right. Which is, I don't know. I don't know what to say to that. I don't think it's right. Is it true though? Oh, but then we went around, mix mix around aging. I proved that it didn't the who approved. We do have our pulse on things.
Speaker 1 00:27:31 The older people have their pulse on things and yeah,
Speaker 0 00:27:36 Nope.
Speaker 1 00:27:38 Right. Like now when I look at the workforce, like, you know, it's true. Like when I was starting out, I used to be in that room with the older people. Now I'm one of those older people and I feel taken seriously. Right. People listen, blah, blah, blah. But, um, but yeah, I can see that, you know, as you start getting older or maybe it'll be like, Oh, but you know, yeah. Do they really know unless you were
Speaker 0 00:28:04 Definitely, you know, everything I know. Well, yeah. And like, and then the other, uh, another one of her friends actually mentioned something interesting, which is, as they were kind of getting older, um, they were feeling that, um, you know, like in their, I guess in their youth, they were worried about getting that career and then like, and then when they got into their career, then they, they feel like maybe they had like, given up on other opportunities that they had, um, or that they did, or they were giving up opportunities currently. And so like that, that's an interesting, I thought that was a really interesting,
Speaker 1 00:28:44 Because that's like also related to our earlier one, right. Where it's like that regrets. Um, and in this case, it's applies to the career because it's kind of like the roads not taken. So, um, and, and you see that even in movies and stuff too, right? Like sometimes people folk over rotate one way or another, right? Like they either focus so much on their career and progression in a specific direction that maybe they don't develop in other ways, or they don't spend the kind of quality time they want with them, maybe their families or friends, or maybe they don't invest, you know, in something like, I don't know, fun, moral, but whatever. So those kinds of things, again, tend to add to your regret list as you get older.
Speaker 0 00:29:32 I know it's, it's, it's just, anyway, I've just learned that our friends are quite deep fingers. It's surprising because I think
Speaker 1 00:29:43 That every time we would bring up the topic, the people were quick to respond. Like they were like, Oh, one, two, three, one, two, three, like, you know, like, I'm like, Whoa, okay,
Speaker 0 00:29:54 Slow down. Obviously
Speaker 1 00:29:57 This is all over WhatsApp or messages or whatever. Exactly. And I'm like how, wow. You know, and, and it was really nice to sort of, you know, sort of say, Hey, we never actually talked about these things. No. You know,
Speaker 0 00:30:09 It was kind of like what I found, what I found kind of, um, useful or helpful about it was just that, you know, like when you're in your own head and you're thinking about these things, like, it feels very isolating. Like you think to yourself, like, Oh, like, like it's not that even that am I the only one who feels this because, you know, logically that it isn't, but like once you talk it out, it just helps knowing that like no other people are going through this too. And like, you know, it's, you're not that you're not that isolated, like these are legitimate concerns. And like, it's, they're legitimate enough that other people are having them as well. Right. So that was, yeah.
Speaker 1 00:30:51 I, you know, I'm actually looking at one of the messages now and, um, it, it was one friend who, um, who sort of, uh, we need to give names,
Speaker 0 00:31:03 Ask them when we call you. Well, we already have one Kiki.
Speaker 1 00:31:10 Um, okay. Um, but you know, and this is a, and she sort of put it, you know, in that the changing fears and basically how, you know, the fear of living at home forever when you were young, super young, it's like, Oh my gosh, when am I going to get out there and do my own thing? Um, you know, in your early twenties and stuff. And then as you're getting into relationships and things like that, it's like in the thirties, like in fertility, um, like those kinds of issues. Right. And it's about like, Oh my gosh, like I want to start a family, but am I ready? Am I not ready? Am I going to, if I don't have it right now, like, am I doing the right thing or wrong thing, whatever, or can I even have kids, can I even have kids, um, forties, you know, um, the, the, if, you know, if you're married, um, maybe you're worrying if your marriage is going well and knock a board, it is. And if it's not, or your relationships, or if you're alone, like what, what are the consequences and fears there? And then fifties, what was it? Oh, it says age discrimination at work as one approaches, retirement issues with work-life balance. Yeah. Like, I guess, you know, if you're starting to think like what, what's the right mix, what are the important things in life, but also the fun things, I guess.
Speaker 0 00:32:28 Um, and you know, and I, I actually, I think about that, I have been thinking a lot about this. It's just like, what, what is, um, like what do you find divorced now? You know, like things like, like what do you, I, I'm not explaining this well, but it's more like, um, like things that I thought were so important in my twenties and thirties, like, I'm just finding that, like, maybe they're not so important anymore. Interesting. Give me an example. I know, like, I'm just thinking that like, um, you know, like, so when I was younger, like prestige at work really seem to matter to me, you know, like moving up the hierarchy, like getting, getting, like getting all the accolades, getting all of the different, like, you know, like, um, all the checkboxes, all of the different, um, uh, you know, just going out through all of the tiers and like, but then, you know, I don't know, like sometimes I think at the end of the day, like, does it matter if you hit that tier?
Speaker 0 00:33:28 Like, did it, did it, does it really, does it really change the world in any way, if you, if you hit that milestone, do you know what I mean? Like at the end of the day, like who does it matter to like other than yourself? Yeah, exactly. And so, yeah. You know, just kind of like, as you move through life, you kind of have to like, you end up reevaluating things and what matters to you. And so it's not like I figured it out and I'm still thinking about it, but yeah, it's just, it's just one of these things that, you know, you just,
Speaker 1 00:33:59 Would you say that you're kind of mellowing then maybe I'm mellowing or maybe I'm just exhausted. I know that there have been times, but no, that's actually a good point. Like, so, right. Like, I think when I was younger, it was about being taken seriously and, and moving up very much as it stopped fully. But yeah. But I, I know that I'm much more prone to sort of saying, okay, let's take a moment. Let's evaluate what's truly necessary. But yeah, maybe that's kind of why people start looking for that work-life balance, which we're still working on. Exactly. That's a different topic. I know, but I think that we kind of,
Speaker 0 00:34:55 I think we've given a good, like discussion around and not a lot of our, a lot of our fears. Um, I think that I'd like to hear from our listeners actually. I want, like, I'm sure a lot of these resonate with a lot of you, but I'm curious to hear what other fears you might have, like about aging or even fears that have changed as you've aged, like from your twenties to the age you are currently.
Speaker 1 00:35:18 Yeah. And basically like us, are you afraid that you've made, um, or you will make mistakes that aren't in your best interest for the future and, uh, yeah, no. Um, absolutely. I'd love to hear that. So make sure that you, uh, you know, check us out on desk. Does this make me look old.com?
Speaker 0 00:35:39 We have a contact page there, so yeah, just fill it out and then it'll go straight to our email and, um, or, or you can actually email us at, does this make me look
[email protected]
Speaker 2 00:35:50 And we're also on Instagram and Facebook and Twitter. So we look forward to hear from you. All right. See you next time.
